Teach Me to Drive a Standard (Negan x OC)
by TeamCarlisle
Summary: Negan comes across Amy fighting for her life on her farm... then he suggests she come with him to the Sanctuary
1. The Farm

The dead had long since closed in on the lone farm house that stood proudly on a hill that had somehow escaped most of the carnage in the earliest stages of the apocalyptic state of the world. Amy knew it was only a matter of time before the inevitable doom showed its face on her doorstep.

There were others for a bit she had kept company with, though some hadn't returned from a run into town and others she had witnessed fall victim to the bites and rips of the walking dead.

Now, Amy sat on the couch with her shotgun in hand with the last box of bullets on a small coffee table in front of her. Outside she could hear them growling, clawing and longing to sink their rotten teeth into her flesh like they had done so many others.

She would never accept her fate - not when she had lasted this long and had a will to live and beat the odds. One by one her small group had dwindled until she sat alone in the darkening atmosphere.

Amy turned, perching herself on her knees on the couch when the sound of her wooden fence being plowed through caught her attention. There were headlights - lots of them; and the herd of dead ones began to drop as four trucks with plows on the front began to sweep where her front yard had once been.

Little by little the herd that swept like a sea of death over her property turned their attention toward the commotion, inevitably stumbling to their deaths for a second time as the trucks steamrolled their decaying bodies.

Amy knew the visitors could mean her demise just as well as the dead. Every human left, she presumed, had done something terrible and inhumane to remain alive. While she was no exception it meant keeping both her guard and her gun up.

That's why, when the door handle began to turn she took a hard defensive position. Amy had managed to maintain her home and giving it up without a fight was not an option. Still, a part of her hoped for the best when the stranger entered through the door.

"Don't move," she warned with a casual hardness in her unshaken voice. Amy cocked the shotgun to allow the man a chance to recognize what she was working with.

"Easy now, doll." He put his hands up as he took a step inside. "I'm not here for a fight."

"Just keep your hands right where they are."

He smiled in a way that oozed with confidence despite the double barrel pointed toward his face. "I'll play by your rules now, doll, if you play by mine later."

"First off, I'm not your doll... second, I'll decide what rules I'll play by."

"Fair enough." He nodded once with a grin and held her determined, hard stare. While her eyes were icy and laced with hostile distrust, his were locked in a playful squint that matched his grin that just wouldn't quit.

"What do you want?"

"I'm here to save you, d..." He caught himself before finishing off the term of endearment that typically rolled off his tongue with ease. After clearing his throat he asked, "What's your name?"

She wasn't one for games and with the chaos still ensuing outside she decided to honest. "Amy Jones... about a bland as you can get. Why... what's it matter?"

"I just wanted to address you properly, Amy. Seeing as you were offended by my use of the word doll."

"What's your name?"

He held a strong hand out, prompting Amy to shift her barrel from his face to his groin. "Negan..." he swallowed hard now but managed a chuckle, "You know I prefer that shit pointed at my face."

"I'm not interested in what you prefer. What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to save you," he reminded her.

"I don't need to be saved."

Negan glanced over his shoulder out the front door. "Well I'd have to disagree with that. You have a hell of a fuckin' problem on your hands and you ain't taking down a herd that big with a damn shotgun."

"What if I don't go with you? Will you try to force me?"

Negan chuckled louder now and looked around, shaking his head before regaining eye contact with her. "No... no I would never fuckin' force you to do anything Amy. But i would have to leave her saying that you are far dumber than you appear."

"Is that right?"

"Fuck yeah it is. You have these dead fucks out here ready to eat you... and whole fuckin' lot of 'em at that." He eyed her attire and power stance. "Now, I can tell you can take care of yourself but shit, no one person is taking that on alone. Hell, my boys out there are struggling in those big ass trucks."

"Boys in bigass trucks... a big talker with a..." Amy glanced at the weapon in his hand, "...baseball bat and a leather jacket. Don't think for a second I'm going to go with you in exchange for being some love slave."

"Shit..." Negan made a face. "What the fuck do you think I am?"

"I have no fucking idea."

"Well if it means anything I don't tolerate that shit. At the compound where we live I've killed men for attempting any kind of... predatory behavior."

"Must be the truth... you just said it."

Negan smiled wide. "You are a very interesting woman."

"Hardly..." Amy huffed a breath from all the adrenaline as her hands squeezed the shotgun with more force.

"I beg to differ."

"I've worked on this farm my whole life, wore mostly blue jeans and white tank tops, dated the neighbor boy in high school and can wear the hell out of a ponytail."

Negan laughed a little louder. "And after high school? Seems like it's been a good ten years..."

"Fourteen." Amy shook her head and got back to the point. "Look I -"

"Come with me." Negan genuinely tried to sway her now. "Your chances suck right now if you were to stay and I'm sure it's fuckin' hard because I have a feeling this is your family's home from before, but there comes a time when we all have to let shit go. I'm not going to fuckin' hurt you, you won't be a slave to anything. I have a place where you will fucking thrive honey."'

"I'm not your honey." Amy swallowed hard but eased up with her shotgun. "What's the catch?"

"I need people. You're a strong person."

"You don't know that."

"I don't want to brag but I have a very useful skill of being able to read people and Amy... you are a strong fucking person who I want on my staff. Hell, I might just give you one of the good rooms right off the bat with a window, some wine and shit you don't look like the video game type but I got that shit too."

"Negan..." a voice came over the radio that was attached to his belt. "We gotta get the hell out of here... one truck almost got stuck in the dead sludge."

Negan looked at Amy with a shrug. "What's it gunna be? You walkin' out this door with me or are you going down with the ship?"


	2. Fishtail

Amy had decided to take a chance on the pack of men that had come storming onto her property like some sort of unorthodox rescue squad. Life now was about taking chances and with death looming outside of the walls of her home it felt like her best option, even if it was a gamble.

"Well let's fuckin' go then, shit..." Negan eyed Amy as she arched her neck to look around him out a large picture window.

"We have a path to the attached garage over there if your guys can hold them off for another minute or two."

Negan glanced over his shoulder, seeing just the outline of the structure she was speaking of and huffed a laugh. "Give me a good fuckin' reason."

"I have big pickup truck loaded with shit... personal shit."

"Useful shit?" He narrowed his eyes.

"Useful shit," Amy confirmed.

Negan let out a deep sigh through his nose and reached for the walkie talkie again. "Hold them off for another minute. This woman is batshit crazy and I like it." He smiled and then continued on with his command, "Lead them away. Seems we have a vehicle to retrieve in the barn off to the side."

"Not getting back in with us?" A woman's voice came over the radio.

"No, Arat. I'm taking a chance on the farmer's daughter here." Negan reclipped the radio to his pants and then nodded. "We have a two minute window by my guess. Take the lead honey."

"I'm-"

"Not my honey... yeah, I know. Let's go."

Amy pulled the front door back open, watching as the herd had switched its focus to the loud beeping of the trucks as they began to slowly lead them away. When she felt it was safe she hurried out into the yard, feeling Negan at her heels as she made a run for the oversized two car-garage that had more of a barn appearance, as Negan had described. She looked once over her shoulder as they went, still sporting the shotgun and felt a sense of relief when they reached the tall double doors.

Negan glanced around, covering her as she unhooked two large, metal latches that led inside. "You know you should've probably locked this shit up."

"Someone would be pretty stupid to steal from me. I typically shoot on command if anyone steps foot on my property uninvited." She huffed a breath and looked over her shoulder at him, "Guess it's your lucky day."

He smiled wide and a ran a hand down his beard. "I have never enjoyed a threat so much in my life."

Amy flung the doors open with a grunt and immediately reached for a set off keys that hung on the wall off to the right. She nodded toward an old, beat-up maroon truck. "Get in."

Negan purposely took his time, loving the challenge she presented and wanted to push her buttons a bit. He ran his fingers over the top of a pitch fork. "We could use some of this farming shit."

"No time. Get in." Amy was already hopping in the driver's seat.

He removed it from it's perch and eyed the tool for a moment, bringing it with him around to the opposite side of the vehicle. He rested an elbow on the open passenger window, still admiring the pitchfork. "You know... on the days Lucille needs a rest this wouldn't be all that fuckin' bad."

She shook her head. "What does that even mean?"

"We'll talk on the ride."

"You seem like you love to do that."

"Well look at that." Negan smiled from ear-to-ear again, pulling the passenger door open and carefully placing the pitchfork into the back seat on top of several large duffle bags. "You seem like you have great character reading skills too."

Amy rolled her eyes and placed her foot on the clutch, sensing Negan watching her every move as she started up the standard truck.

"They don't make 'em like this anymore," he commented, impressed with her knowledge of driving what had become the old-fashioned way.

"They don't make 'em at all anymore." Amy put the car in drive, sending them jolting forward with a jolt that left Negan's head pressed back against the headrest. He let out a laugh, quickly radioed to his people that they were heading around the back side of the house and then looked over intently at Amy.

"You just worked your way up the ladder at the Sanctuary already."

"What's the Sanctuary? Sounds like a place that pretends to be safe but has ulterior motives... or some dark secret."

"I can sell water to a fuckin' well, but I'm not going to try to sell you on this. You can see for yourself and if you don't like it you can go... no questions asked but with much disappointment on my end."

"I'm not buying this 'no catch' bullshit."

"Oh, there's a catch and you're it."

"Huh?" Amy turned to him briefly before looking back out the windshield as they crossed over from the yard onto the long, unpaved driveway that led away from her farmhouse.

"You.. you are quite the fuckin' catch."

"Do women typically go for your cheesy pickup lines?"

Negan couldn't contain a smile. "All the time."

"You are a fresh reminder of why I remained single into my thirties."

He leaned back and rested his hands behind his head, closing his eyes while maintaining his grin. "Maybe it was you."

Amy turned to him again and shook her head. "You know... you really have a Bender from the Breakfast Club thing going on."

"Sweets... you couldn't ignore me if you tried," he quoted from the movie, making her laugh for the first time. Negan took in her body language - the easy grip she had on the steering wheel with her left hand while the other rested comfortably on the gear shift. "You are mighty fuckin' calm."

"Steady hand doesn't always mean a steady mind." Amy cleared her throat. "My poker face isn't bad."

"And how is your mind right now?"

"Still processing that my childhood home is in gone." She alternated glances out the window and to Negan beside her. "But I guess that's nothing in comparison to the people I've lost."

"Ever kill anybody?"

"Yes." Amy stared him down for an extra second, "You?"

"Yep." Negan nodded like it was nothing.

"Seems like you've got a good poker face too."

He pressed his eyebrows together. "Why do you say that?"

"Because... unless you're a complete psychopath killing doesn't come so easy... even in this world."

"Gets easier."

Amy shook her head. "No... we just learn to tolerate the pain that goes along with it. It doesn't get easier. We just become number to the idea of it."

"Hmm..." Negan thought for a moment and turned to stare out the open passenger window, letting his arm hang out. He sighed and let her words filter through him.

"So... are you some kind of psychopath or what?"

Negan didn't immediately respond, as his mind teeter-tottered on the yes and no line of his response. "Aren't we all just a little bit?"

"How did you know I was there? Were you guys watching me?"

"You know... I've never known anyone to answer a question with a question as much as me. I think I met my match."

"Answer," Amy demanded.

Negan was intrigued at her bold nature and wouldn't have typically tolerated being bossed around into answering a question, no matter how important or unimportant. With Amy, however, he played by her rules a bit. "We saw candles burning from a distance for multiple nights while scanning the area," he answered truthfully, "Figured someone had to fuckin' be here to light them."

"So why'd you come when you did and not before?"

"I thought there might be a shotgun-happy farmer girl waiting to blow my balls off for trespassing."

Amy managed a snicker again that she tried to suppress and then nodded to herself as her fingers curled around the steering wheel and she snapped the truck into the next gear when they hit the open road. "If you're not a gambling man you should be because those odds were right on."

"Close... but you did fuckin' spare my nuts and I appreciate that shit." Negan laughed lightly now and watched her shift again. "I like the way you drive this shit."

"I surprise a lot of men."

"I bet you do." He pointed up ahead, "Take this left up here."

Amy hit the gas rather than slow down, making Negan turn to look at her. She knew he wouldn't have hated the fact that she could sense the mild panic on his face and it made her mouth tip up in the slightest grin. Without warning, she took the left hard, purposely fishtailing the vehicle and sending a collection of dust and dirt into the air before regaining full control behind the wheel.

Negan raised his eyebrows and watched as her half-smirk turned into a full blown smile. She turned and looked at him, meeting his stare fully.

"Make you nervous?" She asked.

"Fuck... a little bit," he admitted, laughing again. "Shit."

Amy laughed again. "Gotta have a little fun, right?" She sighed and pointed with her first two fingers, "How far is the Sanctuary?"

"Couple miles. We'll get there soon if we don't hit traffic," he joked.

"Great... then you can tell me about Lucille."

Negan reached beside him for the bat he often doted over and held it up with one hand. "I may have to save that one for when we get back to my room, doll." He winked, pleased when she didn't scold him for referring to her in such a way this time and then placed the bat back down and enjoyed the rest of the wild ride.


	3. Guest

Amy stared across a table at Negan from a where she sat in a metal folding chair. He sported a wide smile and sat leaned back with his feet crossed on top of the table.

"What is this place?" She asked him, fully leaned back with her arms folded protecting her chest.

"This is our community." He slowly waved a hand out to the side.

"And how would I fit in here? From the looks of that warehouse out there it appears there's quite a lot of people. Do they have jobs?"

"Yep." He nodded once as he spoke. "And unless that was a one time show you just put on I'd have to believe that you'd be above those people in the warehouse."

Amy glanced around at the varying shades of gray that decorated the walls and took a deep breath as her adrenaline began to wear off.

"What happened to your group?" Negan asked.

"There were nine of us," she explained. "My sister Emma, her husband Bobby... a couple friends... neighbors."

"And you all just hunkered down on the farm," he suspected.

"We missed a lot of the initial commotion. Bobby underestimated the outbreak. We kind of all thought it would pass eventually but here we are." Amy shook her head and continued, "We had water and food. There's a pond on the property that we continued to use to catch fish. No one was a stranger to hunting."

"So how'd it all unravel then? Seems like you were the only one left."

She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. "Emma wasn't exactly built for this world, not that any of us are. We were close... couldn't be more opposite though. I like to get my hands a bit dirty. She preferred the indoor life a little more, though she wasn't a stranger to tending to the animals we had." Amy shook her head, "She was bitten early on when her and Bobby went on a run into town. Unfortunately she was the guinea pig of our group with regard to the fever. We didn't know what would happen from just a bite."

"I'm sorry," Negan said genuinely.

"We've all lost something... someone..."

"What about the others?"

"Nature took its course with each of them. It took us awhile to establish some kind of order within the group and establish safety parameters. We obviously didn't have the walls like this place and the dead took them one by one. There was another couple Megan and James who just never came back from one of their little missions one day."

"So there was just you then."

"That's right."

"You said you killed someone."

"Unfortunately."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Well there's no such thing as privacy or modesty anymore is there." Amy huffed a breath again, "I told you I don't take well to people stealing from us. We had to defend the property. Every so often a stranger would pass through, we even took one in and he fit in just fine. Others tried to get violent and take what was ours. Once I realized there were no rules and some broad-chested biker had a gun to my friend's head, well I had to go ahead and take him out first."

Negan let a slow smile spread across his face though before he could comment she went on.

"What about you? You said you've killed people. What for?"

"Not following the rules," Negan answered, "And for killing our people first. You see, we have a very strong group here with a hell of a lot of people to defend this place. A smaller group didn't realize who they were messing with and took out some of our guys... I had to send a message to let them know that their behavior was simply unacceptable."

"And let me guess... this bat is your weapon of choice."

He chuckled, seemingly amused that she brought attention to his apocalyptic other-half. "Oh this ain't just a bat, honey. This is Lucille."

Amy chuckled now and then leaned forward, resting her elbows on the top of the table. "Lucille is a bat?"

"You betcha." Negan leaned back and crossed one leg over the other, holding it up to admire in front of his face. "Yeah, she got me through the toughest times of this shithole world." He tapped the barrel gently with his hand, "Didn't you baby?"

"And here I thought you were a single man by the lines you threw my way," she joked, "But I can see you're taken." Amy nodded to the bat in his hands, making him chuckle.

"Well I'm not what you'd call a one-woman man," Negan shot back, "So if you're interested..."

Amy laughed again and looked away, leaning back into the chair again. "No.. no I'm just fine on my own... thanks."

"Well if you prefer women..." He shrugged, purposely holding her eye contact.

"Romantically... no, but if you're all that's left then maybe I should consider it."

Negan let out a hearty laugh, "Give me a chance to change your mind, doll."

"Every time you use that word you move farther and farther away from-"

"Your heart?" He teased.

"I was going to say my pants, but..."

"I like you." Negan couldn't contain a smile. He was beaming in his seat, "You're quick.. and from what I can tell kind of a badass."

Amy maintained his stare and got back to business as she was still unsure of her surroundings, "So what now? What do I do? Where do I go?"

"Shit, you've been through a lot. I'll have my guys set you up in a room for the night and we can talk a little more in the morning," adding, "Unless you want to cohabitate in my room for the night."

"Will I be safe in a room alone?"

"I'd say yes unless a 'no' will get you to come up to the master suite."

Amy fought back a smirk but shook her head, rattling off the worst pickup line she could think of on the spot. "Hey Negan... if I told you you had a nice body would you hold it against me?"

Negan chuckled and set Lucille down on the table in front of him before standing up. "Sense of humor, too. You are just the total fucking package aren't you?" He removed the radio from his waistline again and put it up to his lips. "Arat… I'm going to need you to escort Amy to one of the rooms on the east wing... third floor." He waited for her response and then returned his attention back to Amy, "Trial period. I'll be around in the morning with some breakfast for you and we can talk a little more about whether or not you want to stay here permanently. If so... I have a request that I'm going to ask you to keep between us."

"What kind of request?"

"Well... if you stay I'll ask and if you leave then I guess you'll never fuckin' know." He turned when the big, steel door at the far end of the room opened and Arat walked in. "See... look how fast service is around here." Negan grinned and nodded toward Arat this time, "Take good care of our guest." Without looking back, he exited through the door with Lucille on his shoulder.

Amy huffed a brief, low laugh to herself at his prompt exit and then decided she had no other viable option at the moment. With Arat's eagerness to show her to her room she headed out the door.


	4. Deal

Negan stood above the warehouse after taking Amy on a tour of the Sanctuary staring down at the large group of people moving about doing different jobs with Amy beside him.

"They all earn points," he explained, "It's our version of currency."

"Depending on the type of job they do?" Her fingers curled around the iron railing as she arched her neck to get a better look.

Negan nodded. "That's right. People who do the more important jobs, or skilled labor, well they just get a little bit more than some of the others. The top men and women here have it really fuckin' good... and everyone else has food and shelter." He turned to her, "What more can a person ask for in the conditions we're in right now?"

"And you organized all of this?"

"With the help of a few." Negan took in Amy's wide-eyed nature for the first time, smiling subtly to himself. "Come on... one place left to show you."

"If you say your bedroom-"

His hearty laugh cut her off, "It ain't my bedroom, honey." Negan waved a hand, "Come on."

Amy scanned the area one more time before pushing off the railing and trailing him out of the main building.

"You scared of the dead still?" he asked as they headed outside past the front gates.

"Scared?" She shook her head, "Not unless there's a herd of them like back at the farm."

"Cool to go outside the walls on supply runs and shit if I ask?" Negan went on, "If you choose to stay, that is..."

"The walls and fences here," Amy began as she glanced over at them as they walked, "That's all new to me. I've lived my life outside the walls."

"Good." He grinned and motioned up ahead to a building just off to the side.

"What's in there?"

"You'll see in a minute." Negan picked up the pace, prompting Amy to match him as they went and eagerly approached a thick, steel door that he flung open with ease. He held the door, allowing her inside ahead of him. "I'm not going to fuckin' bite you doll," he informed her upon sensing her hesitation.

Amy cruised by him and immediately her eyes began to take in the contents of the place. An air hockey and ping pong table on one side of the place gave off the vibe of an old summer camp while the other half of the oversized room contained a handful of cars - not the beat-up, whiskey-dented types that littered the front of the Sanctuary. The cars in front of her were as new as she could imagine for the apocalypse. Before she could ask any questions Negan was dangling a set of keys in front of her face.

"I see you eye-fucking that Charger," he said with a short, amused laugh.

She turned to him, glancing at the keys for a brief second before looking him in the eye. "How do you have these?"

"Found 'em," Negan told her nonchalantly, "See, the pretty ones gets to sleep inside." He laughed again and made his way across to where the sleek, black Dodge Charger sat. running a hand across the hood, "Fuckin' nice."

"It is." Amy couldn't deny it. Her fingers danced over the door handle.

"Open that fucker up," Negan ordered.

She popped open the handle and eagerly slid into the driver's seat, resting her right hand on the shifter in the middle while caressing the steering wheel with her other. "What's the catch? Why are you being so generous with me?"

"No catch," he told her, "I just fuckin' like you. And I think you can help out around here. You're a girl who doesn't mind getting her hands dirty."

Amy looked up at him with suspicious eyes as he dropped the keys. She caught them before they fell to the ground and then regained his stare.

"Well.. there is one, little catch," Negan admitted.

"What's that?"

"You're going to teach me how to drive a standard."

Amy paused a moment and then let out a laugh. "You... you don't know how to drive a stick?"

"No," Negan said, running his tongue across his teeth as he let a smile decorate his face again. Amusement clung to his features, highlighting a set of dimples, "I want you to teach me... so I can drive this motherfucker around. It's been sitting here and-"

"You really don't know how?"

"Nope." He shook his head. "So how about this... you get your points by teaching me drive this thing. Then you'll maintain that level of points for all the little shit you do to earn your keep here."

"How many points?"

"Enough to keep you entertained, your stomach full and shit drunk a few nights a week if you're into that shit."

Amy huffed a laugh again and then glanced down at the keys in her hand. "I still feel like there's a-"

"That's the only catch," Negan cut her off, "And let me fuckin' tell you I don't treat most people like this... only the ones that I think can do some quality shit around here." He nodded and looked her in the eye, "I think you can do some quality shit and you've got the personality of a survivor. That's what has kept this place alive... and fucking thriving baby."

She sighed and nodded. "It's pretty impressive what you've built here." Amy couldn't deny it. She didn't want to boost his ego any further but seeing the community in its entirety was above and beyond what she had been exposed to post-apocalypse. "Okay."

"Okay?" Negan put both of his hands on the top of the open door frame.

"Yeah." Amy grinned this time and shook her head, "Yeah I'd be stupid not to."

"As I said." He smiled wider and then held a hand out. "So, we got a fuckin' deal then?"

She nodded again and slipped her hand into his. "Yeah... yeah I think we have a deal."


	5. Lesson One

Negan was purposely overzealous in his attitude regarding Amy's driving. He watched intently as she drove them from the Sanctuary to a remote lot a few streets away that he had determined was free of walkers. Every so often Amy would glance at him from the corner of her eye, noticing his subtle smirk and posture that leaned heavily in the direction of the driver's seat.

"Are you sure we should be coming outside of the walls to do this?" she asked as they approached the lot he had picked out.

"I thought you lived a life with no walls," Negan reminded her.

"And look what happened.." Amy turned to make eye contact with him as she slowed the vehicle to a halt beside an old brick building.

Negan motioned to the empty parking lot. "No visible threats." He grinned and popped his door open, "Time to switch places, right?"

She took a deep breath and exited the Charger as he did, shaking her head with a closed-mouth smile as they crossed by each other at the hood of the car. Negan chuckled and slipped casually behind the wheel, adjusting the seat to fit his larger frame as she made her way back in beside him.

"Okay... lesson number fuckin' one." Negan raised his index finger as he spoke and dropped a hand to the shifter while the other remained on the steering wheel. "Teach me."

Amy let out another breath and nodded to herself. "I've never taught anyone before." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and glanced down toward his feet, "Okay.. use your left foot to push the clutch to the ground and then put the car in neutral."

Negan did as she explained and then followed her next commands to start the car and remove his foot from the clutch.

"I just want you to get used to the sound of the friction point," Amy went on, "So slowly lift your foot from the clutch." She waited until a specific sound came from the engine. "Hear that?"

"I did," he confirmed.

"Do the same thing.. press the clutch down and slowly release it until you hear that sound."

Negan did as she asked, repeating the motion several times until Amy went on with the next set of commands.

"You want to apply a little pressure to the gas pedal when you hear that noise and switch the car into first gear."

He listened intently as she went on to explain the maneuver in depth and then nodded, sending the car forward into a ease drive over the cracked pavement. When the car didn't stall Amy nodded with approval.

"That's good," she told him, "You didn't even stall. That's a big step that people usually fail at over and over again the first time, second time, third time.."

Negan nodded to himself and then the two of them jolted a bit when the car stalled and stopped. "Well... shit."

Amy laughed lightly, "I guess I jinxed it."

"You must have." Negan laughed, "Okay.. where do we go from here?"

"We're going to kind of repeat the first few steps again."

"Alright." He nodded, "Walk me through it one more time."

Amy took her time, initially a bit nervous and even skeptical about teaching Negan to drive a standard car; though as the better part of an hour passed she began having fun with it, particularly amused when the vehicle stalled. When all was said and done he stared at her with a big grin and rested a hand on the steering wheel in the empty lot.

"Well... I can't do more than an hour out here, doll. Same time tomorrow, what do you say?"

She nodded, feeling his positive demeanor begin to affect her. Amy chuckled. "Sure."

"As long as some important shit doesn't come up." He smiled again and then exited the car, exchanging seats with Amy again so she could drive back to the Sanctuary. When she slunk into the driver's seat she didn't immediately drive away.

"What would you have done if I didn't go with you back at the farm?" she asked, staring over at him.

Negan cleared his throat. "Well typically I don't force women to do anything they don't want to do," he began, "But, shit, you were as good as a hot lunch to those undead fuckers so I might have had to throw you over my shoulder and make a run for it." The two of them shared a laugh and he went on, "And once you were safe I would have tried to convince you to come with me one more time before being on my way."

"Is that why you call yourselves saviors?" Amy asked him, "Because you go around saving people?"

"That's the idea." He raised his eyebrows, "Now like I said, not everyone has it as good as you will here, but everyone's fed and taken care of. They're surviving just like the rest of us."

She nodded and wanted to continue probing him with questions of, 'why me'? At the same time she didn't want to push it or insult him for putting her on some type of pedestal that she still didn't completely understand.

"Well thank you," Amy told him simply and honestly. "I've kind of been... skeptical, and that made me come off as ungrateful so.. thank you."

"You haven't come off as ungrateful," Negan told her, "Skeptical... fuck yeah, but who isn't? Shit, you're here now, right? I think you made the right fuckin' choice."

She nodded at him, maintaining his eye contact. "Yeah... yeah me too."

He tapped the dashboard and nodded torward the windshield. "Come on... lets get this fucker back to the garage."


	6. Cheers

Amy tossed the keys back to Negan as they parked the Charger back in its home at the Sanctuary.

"Thanks," Negan said simply, leaning a hand on the hood of the vehicle.

"No problem." Amy folded her arms across her chest and leaned casually against the driver's side door.

Negan studied her for a moment and then let a grin spread across his face. "It's spaghetti night."

"Where do I go to eat? Is there like a community place... do I take it back to my room?"

"Whatever the fuck makes you happy, doll." He continued grinning and then removed a small, shredded piece of paper from his pocket, scribbling something down just after and then handed it over. "Remember where the serving stations are?"

Amy nodded and then glanced down at the paper as she took it from his hand.

"Go right to the front of the line," Negan went on, "I'll radio to Simon to let you cut the line. Help yourself to whatever the fuck you want." He gave another fleeting smile and then turned to go, leaving Amy staring at the paper in her hand that simply hand his name written on it.

"Hey..." She called after him, prompting him to turn around. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Amy cleared her throat when he went to leave again and then spoke when he stayed put. "Why are you doing all this for me?"

Negan looked down, another slow grin spread across his face as he ran a hand across his forehead. He looked back up and took a few steps back toward her. "Because... I like you, Amy. A strong woman is kind of my thing." He held her eye contact for a moment and then turned back around and exited through the garage.

...x

"Amy, right?" Simon greeted with a grin just as big as Negan's when Amy entered the area where food was being served.

"Yeah." She nodded, "Simon..."

"Hell yeah." He patted her on the back and waved a hand, beginning to weave in and out of small groups of people. Amy had to hustle to keep up as they made their way up toward a series of long, folding tables that were covered with tablecloths. Behind them were servers placing spaghetti on plates for people in rows. Some helpings filled out the plate, others were far more scarce. Simon towed her with him behind the counter-like set-up and edged in to speak closely into one of the server's ears because of the noise, "I need two full plates."

Two, Amy wondered as the worker nodded, using the oversized slotted spoon to plop down two hefty portions onto two plates. Simon immediately handed one to Amy and kept the other as they began to weave back through the crowd.

"Thank you!" she shouted above the noise of the people who were eagerly waiting their turn to get food for the evening.

"It's our pleasure," Simon went on, "Hey if you put out maybe he'll give you some ice cream." He began to laugh, prompting Amy to shake her head and grin.

Is everyone a Neanderthal here? she wondered, but still overlooked Simon's joke because of the full plate of food that was beginning to tease her taste buds and made her stomach growl.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"Negan thought you might like to join him at the picnic table outside the garage."

"I thought he said I could eat where I wanted to."

Simon turned to her. "I can radio in and tell him-"

"It's fine," Amy stopped him before he could reach for the walkie-talkie he carried. "I'll eat with him. It's the least I can do."

Simon nodded once and led the way back to the area where the cars were parked. When Amy saw Negan sitting alone at the table beneath a tree she felt a nervous flutter for the first time in her stomach. She quietly acknowledged for the first time that she didn't mind his company.

"Thank you for your... hospitality Simon," Negan greeted with a big smile. "I'm trying to introduce Amy to the top fuckin' dogs here. I think she could help us kick a little ass.. what do you say?"

"I trust your judgment." Simon grinned and set the plates down.

"Simon here is my right hand man," Negan explained to Amy. He looked at his comrade. "We'll meet up later. Keep your radio on."

"You got it." Simon glanced at Amy one more time and then headed back toward the main building.

For a moment Amy stood beside the picnic table in silence as Negan studied her again. The quiet almost made for an awkwardness, though Negan nodded toward the empty seat across from him.

"Sit if you want," he said, "But if you'd rather take this shit back to your room then by all means go ahead."

"I'll stay," she agreed, sitting down on the wooden bench in front of the plate.

Negan began to twirl his fork in the spaghetti noodles and looked over at her. "Nobody's forcing you."

"Your infantile jokes started to grow on me today," Amy admitted with a chuckle. She shook her head and took a bite from her plate.

"I'm a bit fuckin' much.. I get it," he admitted.

"It's a little bit of a breath of fresh air that someone can still have a personality as lively as yours in this fucked up world we live in."

Negan cleared his throat and swallowed a bite. "I have to."

"What do you mean?"

"I have to stay lively and shit. If I didn't this place would fuckin' fall like a million others have."

"Fair enough," Amy nodded. "So it's all an act then? The humor, the suave demeanor you put off... the walk, the talk, the leather jacket.."

Negan twirled his fork around in his plate again and took another bite before answering. "This is all me, honey. I've always been kind of a big mouthed asshole and I enjoy being fuckin' funny. Some of it.. sure I have to put on a little show for the crowd at times. Keeps everyone on their toes... keeps them entertained and ready to work."

Amy nodded and took a bite. "I get it," she said with her mouth half full of pasta.

Negan chuckled and purposely took a big bite as he began to talk. "I love a lady who speaks with her mouth full," he mumbled before chewing again.

She finished her bite, wiping her mouth with her hand. "I'm not your typical lady."

"I know.. you like to get dirty." He swiped his face with the back of his hand and set the fork down, staring across at her now with his hands folded. "Thank you for staying."

"Thank you for bringing me here."

"If we had a couple of beers sitting here I'd say fuckin' cheers."

"Well," Amy raised her fork, "Cheers anyway."

Negan grinned and reciprocated her gesture. "Cheers."


	7. Anywhere

**Lesson Two**

"Okay... do you remember the basics?" Amy grinned and watched as Negan repeated the steps they had worked on without a flaw, though laughed when he got the car rolling and stalled it out almost immediately.

"Well, fuck.." He gave a laugh, restarted and got the car moving again across the parking lot.

Amy sat back and let him have the wheel, not saying much unless he asked as they cruised around together. After some twenty minutes she took a breath and clamped a hand down on the headrest behind him. "Ready for reverse?"

"I'll hold off on a comment I have on the tip of my tongue and just say yes." Negan smiled, drawing a light laugh from Amy though she shook her head.

"You can't help yourself."

"I kept my mouth shut."

Amy laughed now and sighed, "Okay.. reverse.. here we go."

Negan passively allowed Amy to rattle off her verbal instructions. He listened, asked a few questions and modestly allowed her to demonstrate what she was explaining. Her positive reinforcement had him chuckling, as it wasn't his style but Negan felt it suited Amy well, complementing her tougher parts.

He had grown to long for the hour a day they spent together. Driving out beyond the Sanctuary walls was his break from it all.

 **Lesson Three**

"We'll take this out onto the road if you think you're good," Amy told him. "The parking lot is getting a little..." She thought for a minute before he finished her sentence.

"Fuckin' boring?"

"Yeah." She patted the dashboard, "Come on. Let's pick up some speed and really start switching gears."

"You gotta ease me into this going fast shit," Negan reminded her, "Take it slow, honey." He winked, drawing a smile that Amy she was beginning to feel was a natural part of the hours she spent with Negan. For the first time she decided to indulge in his humor.

"Why take it slow when you can go hard and fast?"

Negan gave a hearty laugh. "Don't even get me fuckin' started." He shrugged his shoulders and shudders, "You give me fuckin' goosebumps saying shit like that."

Amy snickered. "I was talking about driving. Don't get too excited."

"Too late." They continued to share a laugh for another minute before he nodded toward the road. "Alright.. hard and fast we go."

"Nah.." She put a foot up on the dashboard and rested her elbow on her knee. "Let's take it slow."

"Makes going fast all the more fun later." Negan exited the parking lot and eased onto the street.

"Yes it does."

The two of them shared another laugh before Negan confidently took on the open road.

 **Lesson Four**

"No walkers around," Negan stated, looking around the empty street. "Let's peel this fucker out."

"Are you sure that's the smartest thing to do?"

"No," he admitted, "But sometimes you have to live a little dangerously, doll."

"Aren't we doing that already? All day every day.."

"Yeah but that's survival shit," Negan reminded her, "This is fun shit. You gotta mix some fun shit in, right?" He put the car in park and opened his door, "I'm going to let you do the fuckin' honors."

Amy sighed and smiled, "Putting me on the spot."

"Hey, you were quite the show off the night we met. I'm sure you can handle yourself." He exited the vehicle and rounded the car, nudging her playfully with his elbow as they crossed paths by the front of it. Negan smiled to himself when Amy giggled and then the two of them settled into their new positions.

"You know," she said, closing the door and settling her hands on the wheel and shifter respectfully, "This is supposed to be your lesson."

"I know but you just look so good being a badass in this modern day muscle car." He smiled wide and Amy couldn't deny the fun she was beginning to have with him.

"Alright." She gave in with ease and slowly pulled the car up toward a rusted, old stop sign that was splattered with some unholy substance. In simple habit she looked both ways at the intersection before revving the engine, smiling to herself and then sent a loud squeal into the air as she did as he asked, peeling the car out and flying forward, leaving the smell of burned rubber in the air.

Negan maintained his grin, rolled the window down and let his arm hang freely in the breeze before closing his eyes. He let out a decompressing sigh despite the car continuing to catch speed.

"Where are we going?" Amy asked, raising her voice just slightly above the roar of the engine.

He kept his eyes closed and settled back even deeper into the passenger seat. "Anywhere."


	8. Break

Amy tied her hair back in a ponytail and smiled at herself in the mirror. It was nearly five o'clock and she knew that meant her lesson with Negan was approaching. She had gotten to know a few people in the rooms nearby, though she hadn't established a bond with any of them that held any weight - not yet. In her post-farm life, Negan was her only constant in that regard, and she had begun to enjoy his raw, tell-it-like-it-is attitude.

When a knock came at the door to her room Amy pressed her eyebrows together and then carefully made her way across the room. When she flung the door open a scrawny blond man stood before her.

"Amy..."

"Yes." She nodded, trying to remember his name as Negan had only introduced him from afar.

"Negan sent me to tell you that he'll have to take a raincheck on today's meeting."

Amy felt a wave of disappointment run through her, though she gave a closed-mouth smile before clearing her throat. "Okay. Thank you." She wasn't sure what else to say and was fighting to hide her disappointment.

The man handed her a piece of paper with Negan's name on it. "And go right to the front of the line for dinner."

She nodded and thanked him again before the man excused himself and headed toward a stairwell around the corner. For a moment Amy stood leaning against the open door frame and let out a quiet sigh, wondering what she would do with the remainder of her evening. Excluding her first day at the Sanctuary she had spent every other giving driving lessons to Negan.

It's disappointing, she thought and then immediately corrected herself in her mind. _No, it's just.. boring. I'm bored. I just need to find something else to do._

With that, Amy reached for the key Negan had given her that was attached to a rustic, makeshift lanyard and headed out of the room toward the dining area. A part of her felt guilty for cutting the line, though she didn't want to spend more time than she needed to in the midst of the sweaty, overstuffed crowd. When she retrieved her meal she made her way toward the garage, glancing out of the corner of her eye when she saw Negan and a handful of men gathered together by the front gates. When she noticed him glance in her direction she made a conscious effort to make it appear as if she hadn't seen him and continued walking toward the only place she felt truly comfortable - the garage.

Inside she knew there were billiards-type games, and while she didn't mind being around the hustle and bustle there was another part of her that simultaneously didn't mind being alone. The room she was given, while nicer than most, felt isolated and stale. Amy was used to her big farmhouse with windows and view of the landscape, and so being outside was a far greater option than remaining cooped up inside four walls.

The picnic table where she had eaten with Negan was perhaps the most inviting space on the property. It almost felt a little out-of-place given the industrial feel that the rest of the community had. With a decompressing breath she sat looking outward toward the trees that waved hello from beyond the tall fences. If nothing else, Amy couldn't complain or deny that a little bit of 'me-time' was still possible in the apocalypse.

She took a bite of chicken from her plate and stared outward. The alone time outside immediately got her mind racing with old memories of her family and former group. Amy couldn't help but wonder what they would have thought of the Sanctuary... of Negan.

What is Negan doing right now? Was he going out on a supply run? Were there threats to the Sanctuary he had to deal with?

Amy took another bite and looked over her shoulder this time in time to see Simon approaching just a few feet away from she sat. Had he been a little closer she would have jumped but managed just a deep breath from the way he snuck up on her. To her surprise and approval he set a beer down directly in front of her and then popped the top on one for himself.

"You up for a game of pool?" He asked.

"Did Negan send you to babysit me?" She joked.

"Nah." Simon took a long swig from the bottle. "You just look like you're the new kid in high school without any friends yet sitting over here all alone."

Amy snickered and shook her head. "I just came out here to clear my head. I'm fine." She untwisted the cap on the beer and let the perspiration from the glass coat her palm. "Thanks for the drink."

"You're welcome." He motioned toward the garage with the hand he held his bottle with. "So.. pool?"

Amy put the beer to her lips and closed her eyes when the carbonated beverage began to slide down her throat. When nearly half the bottle was empty she let out a sigh of approval and then looked to Simon who held an amused grin on his face.

"Fuckin' good right?" He asked with a hefty chuckle.

"Yeah.. it is." Amy laughed and took another smaller sip. "Okay.. let's play."

The two of them headed into the garage and Simon flung open the large bay door at the back side that overlooked the wooded area beyond the walls while Amy headed toward the table in the corner and reached for a stick on top of the table.

"So.. what's going on? Is something happening?"

"What do you mean?" He grabbed the other stick and reached for the square of blue chalk that sat flat on the green fabric

"I saw Negan and a few guys talking by the front gate."

Simon grinned and chalked up the end of the stick. "Collections meeting."

"What's that mean?"

"They're going out to collect supplies," Simon explained, "You'll probably head out on the next one. Negan thinks you're a damn fine fit here. But, shit, it's my night off." He took a sip from the bottle of beer and placed it down on the edge of the table.

Amy nodded and set up the rack before sliding the cue ball across to Simon. "Wanna break?"

"Don't mind if I do." He scooped up the ball and then centered it on his end of the table. While Amy found herself enjoying the beer, the breeze flowing in and the incoming sunset, she couldn't help but feel a nagging disappointment in the pit of her stomach when her eyes landed on the Dodge Charger across the way.


	9. Knock Knock

Negan took the stairs to the floor where Amy's room was after returning from Alexandria. He held a grin and decided to offer up his time for the driving lesson he'd cancelled earlier in the day.

He whistled to himself, casually strolling down the last part of the hallway and leaned a shoulder against the door before giving a series of three knocks with the back of his hand.

Negan smirked and waited, anticipating seeing the surprised look on her face when she flung the door open and he was standing there. When a few seconds passed, however, there was nothing - no movement, no indication that Amy had heard him knock.

He cleared his throat, ran a hand over his beard and then gave a second, louder series of knocks. Again, he waited and waited though this time when no one came to answer his call he gave a friendly shout.

"Amy.." Negan cleared his throat again and repeated her name a second time with no luck.

Stepping back a foot or two he put his hands on his hips and looked side to side before finding the key on his key ring that opened her door. Negan waited a moment before deciding to enter uninvited. When the door flung open his eyes scanned every inch of the modest room within a second or two to find it empty.

"Hmm..." He made the noise aloud as he thought and then smiled to himself when he saw a book on the twin-sized bed faced down to hold the page. There was a Coke can next to the bed with a straw in it and he could tell that a stack of other books and magazines had been sifted through. Without wanting to invade her privacy, Negan gave one last glance around the room before ducking back out into the hallway. His assumption was that Amy would be in the garage, and so he headed back down the stairs and out the front doors.

...x

Negan had picked up on the mild disappointment on Amy's face when she had crossed by him out in the front of the Sanctuary earlier in the day. That's why it took him completely off-guard when he heard bouts of laughter and loud talking as he approached the garage. Without warning he casually strolled in through the open bay door, surprised to see Amy, Simon and a few other Saviors drinking beer and playing pool.

"Well, well..." he slunk in with a grin, "Looks like I missed the invitation to the party."

Everyone but Amy seemed to freeze, and Simon set his beer bottle down to the side. "I figured I'd play a little pool on my night off."

"I can see that." Negan continued to smile and held a hand out, prompting Simon to hand his stick over. He then glanced at Amy who continued to stand by casually. "You any good?" he asked.

She shrugged. "I'm no stranger to the game."

"That's not what I asked, honey." He frosted the tip of the stick with a dusting of chalk.

Amy cleared her throat and put her hands on her hips. "Yeah... yeah I'm okay."

Negan tipped the corner of his mouth up in a smirk and then studied the collection of scattered pool balls for a moment. He then leaned down, placing the stick a few inches away from white cue ball and glanced up to meet Amy's stare.

Without looking away he took his shot, sending the cue ball slamming against a red striped eleven, which in turn tapped another green-striped ball to the left and both disappeared into separate corner pockets.

Amy grinned and then snickered. "Nice shot."

Negan continued to maintain her eye contact. "Did that go in? I didn't see it." He stood up straight and then handed the pool stick back to Simon before giving him a hearty smack on the back. "Carry on ladies and gentlemen."

"Not staying?" Amy asked.

"Go work to do." He have a wave and headed out, looking over his shoulder partway for a brief second and then exited the garage as quickly as he'd come.

...x

Amy had steadily begun to see how much weight Negan's presence held amongst the Sanctuary members. Even the alpha male types watched what they said or did around him. The group dynamic and pecking order had become increasingly clear, that why Amy wasn't sure if she was out of line going directly to Negan's room following her pool game with Simon and the others. Still, it wasn't in her nature to be timid and she felt comfortable with Negan so she decided to approach him on her own.

She hadn't felt nervous on the walk up until she was standing in front of his door. Amy raised her hand to knock but then stopped herself and scrunched her nose.

Should I or shouldn't I? she wondered. Amy wasn't even sure of what she was going to open with and hated that abnormal feeling of anxiousness that she wasn't at all used to feeling. After telling herself to stop being ridiculous she went ahead and gave a subtle knock on the door and then took a deep breath. After an extra long moment of nothing she raised her hand again but jumped back when the door abruptly opened and Negan stood in front of her. His hair was messy, eyes heavy and he had no shirt on and bare feet.

Amy lost all wits about her for a moment and then felt her stomach sink. "Did I wake you?"

Negan cleared his throat and then managed a smile. "No I was doing fuckin' yoga," he joked, and then scratched the back of his head and looked her up and down, leaning an arm on the open door frame. "What are you doing knocking on my door so late doll?"

She chuckled and shook her head. "Not looking for that."

"Not looking for what?" Negan raised his eyebrows and his grin grew wider when her cheeks became flushed with a dark blush. He took a step into the empty hallway. "Why so shy all of a sudden?"

"What?"

"You were matching every shithead thing I said with a badass comeback that almost had the ability to shut me up." Negan gave a light laugh as he stepped further into her personal space. "Now it looks like I kind of make you nervous, doll."

Amy looked up at him from just a few inches away, not breaking the heavy eye contact he had initiated and then gently placed a hand on the top of his chest, letting her fingers glide downward until she saw his Adam's apple rise and fall in his throat as his jaw tensed up. With a grin followed by an amused giggle she stepped back and eyed him again. "Now who's making who nervous?" She turned to go, leaving him standing there to clear his throat, amusement still clinging to his features as his pupils dilated with a hint of desire.

"Now, that's the girl I know," he called after her.

She glanced over her shoulder, managing a half-smile and continued on as he shouted again.

"You still didn't say what you came up here for."

Amy spun around now and put her hands out to the sides. "I guess you'll never know."


	10. You and Me

"So since you cancelled on me yesterday," Negan began, smiling as Amy fell right into the argumentative banter he was itching for.

"You mean when you cancelled on me," she shot back.

"And you ran right into Simon's arms."

Amy laughed loudly and leaned back in the passenger seat. "You didn't come across as the jealous type." Before he could reply she pointed. "Are we going to drive or what?"

"We?" Negan asked. "What are you going to come over here and sit in my lap honey?" He laughed. "Shit, I won't stop ya."

Amy placed a sneakered foot on the dashboard and Negan swiftly sent the car driving forward down one of the roads they typically frequented during the lessons.

"You're a fast learner," she commented.

Negan turned to her for a moment and then pressed his eyebrows together when he felt the car begin to jerk. "Oh what the fuck.." A second later the car came to a rolling halt as the engine died.

"What happened?" She asked.

"You tell me doll." Negan tried to start it up but the car wouldn't cooperate. "Well shit.." He huffed a breath and then looked around the empty street and into the woods to the left. "Let's fuckin' hope a herd doesn't come through."

Amy glanced around the immediate area and watched as Negan reached for Lucille in the back seat before exiting the vehicle. Without hesitation she followed.

"Where are you going?"

"Home." Negan gave a wave, "Let's go honey. It'll be dark in a half hour or so."

"We're walking back?"

"Unless you can get this mother fucker started."

Amy hurries into the driver's seat and began toying with the keys in the ignition, desperately trying to get the car started. When nothing worked she sat roughly back in the seat and turned when Negan approached and placed his hands on the door frame.

"Let's go," he urged.

"We're just going to leave it here?" Amy ran her hand over the steering wheel.

"I can attach chains around your waist and you can fuckin' pull it back." Negan grinned and she sighed. "We're only a couple miles out. You don't seem like a stranger to a little hard work and exercise."

Amy exited the vehicle and eyed him a moment. "I don't know how you see the humor in all this."

"It's better than being pissed off over something out of our control." Negan put the bat on his shoulder and began the trek back to the Sanctuary. Amy let out a loud sigh and then hurried to march by his side. A second later she felt a single raindrop and then another.. and then another.

"Just when I was about to say this situation can't get much worse," she commented.

"Shit, honey, where the fuck are you in a rush to?" Negan glanced over as they walked. "Got a date or some shit?"

Amy rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah."

"So what the fuck is the big deal?"

"We could be killed out here."

"You and me?" Negan laughed. "I put my money on us."

Amy smirked and saw him grin wider from the corner of her eye. When the rain picked up a bit she turned to Negan and gave him a look.

"Don't tell me you don't enjoy getting a little fuckin' wet," he joked.

Amy snickered. "No.. I don't."

Negan remover the leather jacket he was sporting and handed it over. "Take it."

"No, I-"

"Fuckin' take it," he insisted.

"Amy grabbed the jacket and threw it on. "Thank you."

Negan nodded and placed the bat back on his shoulder over a plain white T-shirt, "Me... I don't particularly mind getting wet." He ran a hand through his already slicked back hair.

Amy lifted the jacket so it covered her head when the skies opened up and it began to downpour.

"Fuck.." Negan motioned to the woods and the two of them ducked beneath the cover of the trees in an attempt to stay remotely dry.

"If we get back to the parking lot we can hang out in the building there until this passes," Amy suggested.

The roar of an engine caught Negan's attention and a set of headlights had him pulling Amy by the arm to duck behind an oversized tree.

"What's going on? Who's that?" She asked, feeling a spike of adrenaline filter into her limbs.

"I don't know." Negan watched as an old Jeep Wrangler cruised down the road, slowing down by the car they had abandoned.

"That could be someone from the Sanctuary to give us a ride back."

"Maybe," he said quietly. "Maybe not."

"Do we have enemies out here?" Amy asked, prompting Negan to glance over and make eye contact briefly before he eyed the stranger on the road again.

"We'll talk about that tonight over dinner," he told her, and then added flirtatiously despite the potential danger, "By a warm fire."

"Negan, I'm serious," she whispered.

"So am I." Negan turned to her with a half smirk. A car door snapped his attention back to the road and he watched a lone man pace the distance from his car to theirs. "He's not one of ours."

"How can you tell?" Amy asked.

"I know m my people." Negan pulled her by the hand with him and Amy swallowed hard as she gripped his hand tighter and blindly followed. "Just run with me doll," he said between choppy breaths as their breathing picked up.

Amy didn't respond but followed a step behind him. Her heart began to beat faster with each step and as they emerged from the trees onto the road her stomach dropped as if she was on a rollercoaster.

Without a word Negan released her hand and headed for the driver's seat of the Jeep, leaving Amy just a split second for her brain to tell her legs to run. She hurried, the world around them a blur as she lunges for the passenger door handle, flinging it open in time to see Negan slamming the door on his side.

"Close the door honey," he said calmly despite the heavy breaths he was exerting that were already fogging up the window beside him.

"What the fuck!" A male voice shouted from outside.

Amy turned, noticing the car was a standard and was about to give Negan some instruction, though he swiftly kicked the car into reverse full speed and unrolled the window at the same time to hold up a middle finger at the man they had left standing in the pour rain. He let out a hearty laugh and without warning he whipped the car around, sending it spinning and squealing in the rain.

Amy let out a laugh but let her jaw drop as a gun shot rang out in the night. Negan turned to look at her and noted she was okay as they whipped around a bend in the road and out of sight of the stranger.

"You okay?" He asked, fiddling for the lever that worked the windshield wipers while switching gears just after.

"Yeah." Amy pushes her wet hair out of her eyes and threw it back into a ponytail. She smiled, "Yeah.. yeah we're okay right?"

"Like I said.. I bet on you and me against anybody doll." Negan let out a louder laugh and floored the gas pedal, sending them barreling down the back road toward home.


	11. Play Fight

If anyone is interested in a movie trailer I made one for fun. if you go to the YouTube website type in /mCSp6v7msn4 after it.

* * *

Amy finally felt the heavy, relaxed feeling take over her body when Negan safely ducked the Jeep into the garage within the Sanctuary's walls. She ran both hands over the top of her pulled back hair, feeling the sleeves of Negan's oversized jacket creep up her palms.

"Wow." She smiled with a chuckle. "I think you officially topped any crazy driving I've done."

"Yeah, well, good thing I have a good teacher." Negan killed the engine and let both of his hands rest on the steering wheel for a moment before taking a deep breath. He glanced over at Amy who leaned an elbow on the door and rested her head in her hand.

"That could've ended badly," she said to him.

"Yeah," he agreed. "But it didn't." Negan nodded to himself and then popped open the door. "It's hot as fuck in here."

Amy sat still for a moment, almost having the feeling of a post-workout and then decided to exit as the humidity got the best of her.

Negan slowly paced past the front of the Jeep and crossed over to the pool table. He reached for a stick that had been propped up on the side and habitually caressed the end with chalk. He leaned over and aimlessly hit one ball into another before tossing the stick down and turning back around as Amy approached him.

"I don't usually do stupid shit like that," he confessed with a laugh. "We should've just walked back."

She grinned and let out a little chuckle. "Well you have to live a little." Amy shrugged, making him smile and hold up a hand for a high five. She smacked a hand against his and then giggled when he proceeded to give her a friendly shove.

Amy laughed lightly again and shoved him back. "Don't test me," she told him with a laugh.

"Or what?" Negan pushed her shoulder with one hand again, laughing when Amy went after him playfully and he caught both of her arms before leaning in and stealing a kiss. When her mouth opened just slightly and her eyebrows raised Negan released her arms but remained in her personal space. Before either of them could say anything Amy met him halfway and kissed him again, chastely at first.

She closed her eyes when Negan's embrace grew more heated as he penetrating her lips with his tongue. Her arms latched around the back of his neck, feeling beads of leftover raindrops where his hairline ended. When he parted from her to take a breath she pulled him back, reconnecting her lips with his and secured her rain-soaked body against his.

Amy's fingers tangled in Negan's hair, encouraging him as he trailed his lips down her neck with an aggression that left him grunting until he sought out her breasts.

She closed her eyes when he successfully pushed down the front of her green tank top beneath his leather jacket that she still wore.

Amy slipped her arms out of the oversized sleeves and Negan brought his lips up to her ear when the jacket slipped off of her shoulders and onto the ground. "That looked good on you," he whispered, immediately allowing her to pull his face back to her with a moan when their lips connected again.

Negan towed her with him to a small couch in the dark corner of the garage by the pool table and pulled her down so she sat on top of him.

When she removed her tank-top Negan simultaneously began to unbutton his pants.

"Shit, doll," Negan couldn't maneuver the button fast enough. "Take those wet jeans off."

Amy landed a hard, closed mouth kiss on his lips. "You first," she whispered.

Negan shoved his pants down off his waist and let them drop to his ankles without getting up. Amy fulfilled her end of the bargain and did the same before straddling him again on the couch. She bit down on her bottom lip when she felt his erection pushing up against her and lifted her gaze to meet his.

Negan stared at her with heavy eyes, keeping his head back against the cushion. When she leaned back in to kiss him his eyes closed and he gripped her hips to align her in his lap.

Amy immediately connected herself to him leaving Negan with a groan as he tilted his head back.

"Negan.." she whispered against his lips in between deep breaths. "Can I ask you something?"

Negan kept his eyes closed and let his fingers dig into the soft flesh of her hips. "Yeah," he choked out.

She gripped the back of his head more firmly and gave a gentle tug at his rain slicked hair when his teeth began to graze her neck. When Negan moaned against her Amy smiled to herself and whispered her question into his ear. "When did you really learn how to drive a standard?"

A slow smile spread across his face. "My junior year of high school."

Amy laughed and tightened her arms around him, kissing him again. "I fucking knew it."

"Forgive me?" Negan asked, forcing her to make eye contact with him.

"Depends on how good of a lay you are." Amy purred a laugh against his lips, drawing one from Negan that seemed to echo off the walls of the empty garage.

He ran a hand through her hair. "Only one way to find out."


	12. Driving Lessons

Amy laid with her hand behind her head on one end of the couch beneath a blanket that rose halfway up her bare chest. One foot dangled off the edge and the other was flung lazily over Negan's midsection as he mirrored her position from the opposite side of the couch.

"Why'd you string me along?" She asked.

Negan kneaded her calf with his fingers. "I wanted to get to know you."

"By lying about driving a stick?"

"Honestly.. I didn't think you'd find a fuckin' reason to spend time with me otherwise." He grinned. "You didn't seem to take a liking to me at first." Negan squinted his eyes and nodded his head, "When did you know I was full of shit?"

"I suspected like a week ago." Amy chuckled and returned the gentle massage he was giving her. "But tonight when you whipped that Jeep around." She shook her head and eyed him with accusation.

"You still showed up to give me lessons."

She nodded and maintained his eye contact without responding otherwise.

"Because you kinda fuckin' like me," Negan concluded.

"You won that game."

"What game?"

"Make me like you just enough to get in my pants and then.." Amy shrugged, "What do we do now that you don't need lessons anymore? If I was smart maybe I wouldn't have told you about my suspicions."

"Well.. we can still go driving," he said, "Or I could just pencil you in for some wild sex every night instead."

Amy laughed and then sighed, placing her hand behind her head again. "It wasn't that wild," she teased.

"We can work on that." Negan grinned, causing her to do the same.

"So... now that dinner by a warm fire has gone out the window.. do we have enemies out there? Do you have any idea who that man was we just took the car from?"

He cleared his throat and ran a hand over his beard. "There are other communities nearby. Resources are limited." Negan thought for a minute on how to word the dynamic he had with the other communities. "There's some fuckin' tension because, well.. I have mouths to feed here. They have mouths to feed there; and quite fuckin' frankly in this survival of the fittest world we've been thrown into I have to worry about my people, not theirs. So, do we have enemies? I guess we do.. because just like me they have leaders who are doing all they can to take care of their own."

"And the man in the car?"

"No fuckin' idea." Negan leaned his head back and closed his eyes, "And no exaggeration doll, we are at the top of the fuckin' food chain. So if there was any attempt at retaliation we will have no problem putting a fuckin' stop to that shit.. and then some."

"What does that mean? And then some.."

He opened his eyes and lifted his head to look at her, "That question really will have to be left for another night.. by a warm fire."

Amy smiled. "You're a complicated man."

"Not really." Negan tipped the corner of his mouth up in a grin, "I'm a straight shooter, doll. I just don't have the energy to get into that conversation tonight. Tomorrow night, unless something goes all kinds of fuckin' wrong, I think I can make some time to explain a little more in depth about how we do things around here."

She nodded. "Fair enough."

"Mm.." He closed his eyes again and let out a deep breath. "What are the chances I can talk you into riding my dick again?"

"What are the chances you'll last longer than four minutes?"

Negan laughed without opening his eyes. "Honey that was at least six." He chuckled to himself again when she laughed and then swallowed hard when he felt her calf begin to rub against him. "Is that your way of saying yes?"

"I don't know if I'm up for doing all the work again." Amy stopped what she was doing but purposely parted her legs just slightly. She waited for Negan's reaction with a grin.

"You don't seem to mind a little hard work." Negan waited and then chuckled when she yawned and closed her eyes. He tossed the cover to the side, causing her to immediately reopen them. Amy laughed when he draped it over his back and eagerly climbed on top of her.

"You know I rarely stick around to talk to someone after we fuck around," he admitted, hovering above her. "But, shit, I just can't seem to shut up around you."

"That's because you kinda like me too Negan." Amy whispered, crinkling her nose as she grinned and accepted a heated kiss he initiated. She wrapped her arms around his bare shoulders and let her legs rise above his hips as he locked his arms beneath them.

When she moaned into his mouth he echoed one back. Amy closed her eyes as he got their love making session under way. As bad as she tried telling herself that Negan was wrong for her she couldn't deny that being with him felt right. They laughed, they talked a little shit and best of all they challenged one another. The adrenaline-filled evening had left both of them yearning for more from each other; and Negan's bold move to finally cut through the tension with something as simple as a stolen kiss kicked that door wide open.

Amy couldn't deny it had been awhile since she had been remotely intimate with anyone and wanted to place all of the praise on her current euphoria on that; however she couldn't deny her sexual compatibility with Negan. Without having to say a word he did all the right things - pinning her hands down and vigorously locking his fingers with hers above her head; alternating between kissing her hard and ravaging her neck; switching the pace of his hips as they collided with hers from intense and hard to tauntingly slow.

Negan didn't immediately part from Amy as both of them laid sweaty, breathing heavy and tastefully exhausted.

She kept her eyes closed and let her fingers trace imaginary lines down his damp, glistening back as he released decompressing breaths against the nook of her neck. Her inner thighs still clung to the outsides of his as Negan still hooked his arms loosely under the backs of her knees.

"I didn't realize how much I miss doing that," Amy finally said, sighing the words out loud.

"I could tell.. and I think anyone in a half-mike radius probably could too." Negan laughed against her bare skin at his own comment.

"For once I've got nothing," she admitted. "No comeback." Amy sighed again and felt Negan lift his head off of her.

"Well, shit, I fuckin' rendered you speechless."

Amy toyed with his hair as he grinned at her and she laughed lightly. "It's just been awhile." When Negan presses his eyebrows together and gave her a look she laughed again. "And.."

When she didn't immediately finish the sentence he did for her. "And I just gave you the fuck of the century."

"And that," she agreed.

"So.. you gunna meet me here for some more 'driving lessons' or am I going to have to work the stick myself?"

Amy laughed a little louder, making him grin. "Where do you come up with this stuff?"

"My fucked up mind, honey. You gunna answer my question or what?"

"Yeah.. yeah I think I can arrange for that."

"Okay." Negan continued to smile. "Don't be late."


	13. Eggs and Toast

Amy awoke to the sound of a knock at her door and yawned with outstretched arms. When a second one came she hurried out of bed, hoping it wasn't Negan after seeing her pillow-tossed hair and tired eyes in a small mirror that hung on the wall.

She flung the door open and felt relief when she came face to face with Simon.

"Mornin' sunshine." He flashed a big smile beneath a mustache and snapped bubble gum between his teeth.

"Hi Simon." Amy gave a closed-mouth smile.

"Who made your night?"

She raised her eyebrows as flashes of her hookup with Negan flashed through her mind. "What?"

"Kidding." He smacked her arm. "You just have that disheveled look."

"Smooth talker." Amy removed her hair tie and ran her hands through her hair before throwing it back up into a high bun.

"So.. I'm here because Negan wants you at our meeting today." Simon looked at the watch on his wrist. "We meet in about an hour. It's in the conference room.. the one with the long table."

"Okay." Amy nodded and wondered why Negan hadn't come himself to request her attendance but knew he was always busy doing one thing or another.

"So what's the deal?" Simon asked. When she pressed her eyebrows together and went on with his thought. "With Negan. Are you..."

"Oh.. no," she lied shaking her head.

Simon glanced over her shoulder into her room and leaned an arm on the door frame. "Well.. this just got a little interesting." When he raised his eyebrows with a grin, Amy laughed lightly as she recognized the look on his face.

"No it didn't," she told him.

"A guy can try." He backed off with a shrug. "What about breakfast? We can eat together and then head to the meeting."

"Sounds good."

"I just.." Simon thought for a moment and Amy prompted him to go on when she finally cleared her throat. "I just hope you turning me down doesn't have anything to do with Negan. I mean.. he doesn't care about anyone like that-"

"I'm going to stop you right there," Amy cut him off. "I like Negan. He saved my life, he made feel right at home, we have a good time together. But I'm not trying to.. go steady with him." She laughed at her purposely ridiculous word choice though in the back of her mind she hoped that Simon was totally off on his claim.

He nodded. "Alright."

"I'll see you at breakfast."

..x

Amy sat across from Simon, scooping up the last of the scrambled eggs she was served with her fork and shoved the bite into her mouth. She put his words to the back of her mind and decided to focus on more important things - like the meeting coming up.

"So what's this meeting about?" She asked, wiping her mouth with a napkin.

"Probably collections and other things for the week.. scheduling I guess you could say. We usually meet at the beginning of every week."

"Gotcha." Amy took a swig from a bottle of water, turning when she heard Negan's booming voice behind her as he made a grand entrance into the cafeteria area. He sported a wide smile and pointed Lucille at some random worker, following the gesture with praise for a job well done - whatever that was. When he noticed Amy for the first time as she sat across from Simon the size of his smile suddenly dropped down a notch, though he caught himself before it disappeared completely.

"Just getting a little breakfast before the meeting, boss." Simon grinned and finished a bite of his food.

"I can see that." He strutted over to the table, set the bar down and placed both hands flat on the table between them. Negan notes Amy's empty plate. "What'd you get?"

"Eggs.. toast," she informed him.

"And we split an avocado," Simon added.

"Well that's fuckin' cute as hell," Negan said, laughing to himself as he resumed eye contact with Amy. "Tell me you're not trying to corrupt the newest member of the dream team Simon." He switched his gaze to his friend.

"She's incorruptible," Simon said.

"Is that right." Negan swiftly looked back to Amy, who gave the most subtle of smiles.

"That's right," she confirmed. "I'm.. all business."

His grin widened and dimples emerged on either side of his face. "Well that I can confirm."

Amy tried not to laugh but looked down as she let a smile escape.

"Speaking of business there is something I'll need your assistance with later on." A playful squint highlighted his otherwise serious features. "Make yourself available."

Amy nodded, toying with her fork. "Of course."

Negan reached for the radio on his belt and handed it to her. "Keep it on channel four honey." He flashed a wink.

"Welcome to the big boys club," Simon gushed with a laugh.

"Thanks." She leaned back in her seat.

Negan held her stare for an extra second and then pushed back off the table, swooping Lucille back up and placing it on his shoulder. "I'll see you guys in a few minutes." He turned his back to walk away and purposely called out loud as he glanced over his shoulder, "Enjoy your date."

Amy wanted to shout back that it wasn't a date, but she assumed he already knew that. She wasn't even sure that dating was a thing anymore. Love affairs and sex maybe; or pre-apocalypse couples who were grandfathered in.

But that would mean people would just stop having feelings for each other, and after growing close with Negan over the weeks they had spent together Amy knew that was impossible.

She tried to be subtle in watching him go and felt the slightest victory in her mind when he looked back in her direction one last time before disappearing outside.


	14. Scuffle

Amy wasn't typically intimidated by anyone; though being the newcomer at the table of what Simon kept referring to as the 'top guys' made her feel just the slightest bit of anxiousness. Up until Negan had come into her life on a white horse, rescuing her from the herd at the farm, Amy hadn't been a part of a community after the dead had taken over. Their small unit had survived for some time but now she was unaware of the rules and social normalcies. From what she could tell, however, Negan and his band of brothers were formally organized.

"We're going to need more from the Kingdom this week," Negan opened. "Gavin, take Jared and a handful of others with you. Ezekiel has an understanding of our policies and he fuckin' respects it, so let's not do shit to fuck that up."

Amy eyed a thin man with gray facial hair give a nod. He didn't hold an intimidating physical presence, so she wondered how he worked his way to the top. She assumed it was loyalty and possibly smooth talking on the man's behalf.

"I'll keep Jared on a short leash," the man replied.

"Shorter this time," Negan instructed, "We don't need people being dicks for the sake of being dicks. You act like a dick when someone dick's you over. Get it?"

"Yeah."

"Good." He flashed a grin. "I'll be going to Alexandria with a group of my own." Negan nodded to Amy, "Why don't you ride with us on this one. I'll introduce you to Rick Grimes and his band of misfits at the fanciest fuckin' community this side of the apocalypse."

"Okay," she responded, liking the idea of going with Negan to discover their way of survival.

Simon cleared his throat next to her and shifted in his seat, prompting Negan to address him next. "You know where you're going already."

"Hilltop," he replied.

"And take Dwighty Boy with you." Negan rounded the table from where he stood at the head of it and patted Dwight on the back. "You two make a hell of a one-two combo. Gregory nearly shits his pants when he hears the engines to those big trucks roll on up there."

"Which day?" Simon asked.

Negan moved back to the end of the table so he was before everyone again. "Kingdom today." He used Lucille to tap the table in front of Gavin. "I wouldn't mind having some fresh fruit with my breakfast tomorrow morning. I'm getting kind of sick of avocados." His eyes shifted to Amy's and he grinned just after when she began to subtly shake her head. When Simon glanced over at her she looked back at him with a shrug and paid attention to the rest of Negan's scheduling.

"Hilltop.. first thing tomorrow morning." He nodded to Simon. "You bring back a chicken or two on top of normal collections and I'll give you an extra night off. Maybe you can brush up on your pool."

Simon chuckled, but quickly saw that Negan wasn't laughing back. He simply nodded. "You got it. Gregory would give us his arm if we asked him to."

"That leaves Alexandria." Negan looked to Arat first and then Amy, "We'll take a larger crew out to see Rick in two days."

"Think we'll get any trouble?" Arat asked, "From them.."

"Not if they're smart." Negan paused for a half-second before smiling wide and then looked to Amy. "I'll make my rounds to give you exact times for the next two days. Gavin, assemble your team now and start getting the fuck out of here. I'd like you back before sundown."

"Yes sir." Gavin rose to his feet and Negan handed him a folded up piece of paper before instructing him to go while everyone else remained seated.

Amy stared across the way at Negan who reached into his back pocket, removing several more pieces of lined paper. "Here are the grocery lists, ladies and gentlemen.. for your respective communities. Look that shit over and bring back what we need."

Simon began looking over the list as Negan tossed the folded piece of paper down in front of him. He cleared his throat and rubbed over moustache. "This is last week's."

Negan squinted his eyes and cocked his head to the side, heading back to Simon's side of the table in search of confirmation. When his eyes studied the list and raised his eyebrows. "Well, shit.." He stood up straight and put his hands on his hips. "Come with me. I'll get you the correct shit. Fuck."

Simon winked at Amy, who tried to pay attention to the list that sat between her and Arat regarding their collections at Alexandria. She watched as the two men exited the conference room.

"Could it be a symptom of withdrawal?" Simon asked with a laugh.

Negan turned to him. "What the fuck's that mean?"

"I mean it has been awhile since you've gotten any, right? Since Sherry's been gone. I mean that can really screw up a guy's concentration, you know what I mean?" Simon laughed, "You haven't really been fuckin' the other women-"

"Simon.. shut the fuck up." He began walking again as his friend continued talking.

"Hey, I'm not judging man." He continued to laugh. "I thought Amy might've been lined up for wifehood but if you're not gunna partake do you care if I do? I'm thinking she might be a hot, little-"

Negan grabbed him by the collar and slammed him into the wall. "Did I not just tell you to shut the fuck up?"

Simon immediately pushed him back hard and then caught himself before it went any further. Negan looked around to see if anyone had seen their altercation and then glared back at Simon who could see wanted to go nose-to-nose with him.

"What the fuck," Simon clenched his fists. "I'm fuckin' around.. like we always do."

Negan pointed a finger in his face. "Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? The last I checked you were second in fuckin' command and after all that shit you pulled with the Oceanside people you'll never be back on top." He matched Simon's icy stare, "Unless you fuckin' kill me Simon." The stare down between the two of them continued until Simon's posture loosened up a bit and he took a breath. For a moment there was a lingering, awkward silence and then Simon spoke.

"Are we going to get those lists or what?" he straightened up his jacket.

Negan stared at him for an extra second and then cleared his throat. A part of him wanted to continue reinforcing his point and really hammer it home but he backed off. A part of him knew he had overreacted to Simon's meathead comments - particularly because the two of them typically went back and forth. Still, he couldn't have anyone, particularly his second-in-command stepping on his toes. With that, he kept his response short and simple.

Negan gripped Lucille, purposely letting the bat wave in front of Simon's face and maintained eye contact as he placed it on his shoulder. "Let's go."


	15. Keys

When Negan knocked on Amy's door she was fully prepared to discuss his plans for visiting Alexandria. Being this would be her first go-round he had been adamant about providing her with all of the details leading up to the trip.

Negan entered as Amy quickly waved him in and right away she could tell he wasn't in the best of moods from his stiff posture and the lack of the jovial smile he typically sported when they were together.

"I want to give you the rundown of these people at Alexandria," he explained. Negan eyed the moderate space he'd given her, studying the little touches again that made the room hers.

Amy nodded. "Of course." She wasn't sure if she should offer him a seat.

Negan paced the area and then sat down on the edge of the twin bed that sat against the far wall. Before he began talking about Rick and the rest of the community, his eyes landed on a small easel in the corner by a window.

"You paint?" He asked.

"What?" Amy cleared her throat and then nodded. "Yeah.. I mean in my spare time. I hadn't in so long but Simon found the easel.." Her voice drifted off mid-sentence as Simon's name rattled off her tongue.

Negan studied her posture for a moment leaning back on the bed to put his feet crossed neatly over a nearly empty nightstand. "It's good," he confirmed, "The painting." Negan glanced back at the work of art, eying the farm-like nature of the landscape. "Did you have all those animals at your farm? The cows.. horses.."

Amy cleared her throat. "Before all of this.. yes. And for a little while after the outbreak." She shook her head, "It's funny that all of these big strong animals didn't make it but the tiny, helpless chickens did.. for a time."

"Well.. it's not always the fuckin' biggest and baddest that make it though shit like this." Negan cleared his throat. "Sometimes it's the smart ones.. the lucky ones.. the loyal ones.."

Amy nodded and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She folded her arms and leaned against the wall next to the easel, staring directly at Negan. "So.. Alexandria."

"Yeah." Negan sat upright again and leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, folding his hands by his chin. "I hate to fuckin' admit it because the guy drives me fuckin' nuts, but I like to give credit where credit is due. Rick's people are the A-Team. They haven't fallen in line like others have. They fight. They've attacked out of the blue. I want you to see it for yourself what we really are up against. The other communities, they don't have what Alexandria has. Rick is a fuckin' leader and he'll be as savage as anyone if he needs to be."

"Is he dangerous?"

"Honey, everyone's dangerous." Negan sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I want you to feel it out for yourself. Then later when we get back that day we'll talk."

"By a warm fire?" Amy asked, raising her eyebrows.

Negan grinned for the first time since entering the room. "I intend to pay that debt in about an hour. Unless you have plans to split another avocado with Simon for dinner."

Amy rolled her eyes but smiled and looked at him.

Negan looked down with a chuckle but stood up and nodded toward the easel again. "I mean the fuckin' guy is giving you gifts and shit."

Amy shook her head. "He's trying to be welcoming."

"Yeah welcoming you into his bed."

"It'll never be like that."

"No?"

"Not with Simon." Amy shook her head again but let a slow smile spread across her face as Negan closed the distance between two of them, stalking her like a lazy cat.

Negan put a hand on the wall beside her. "Good.." Negan grinned wider. "Because you are so fucking out of his league."

Amy laughed and looked down and then back up, meeting Negan's lips as he leaned in to kiss her.

She moved a hand to the back of his neck and pulled away with a giggle as he let out a subtle moan.

"I'd proposition you here but I think you'd be a little embarrassed if everyone on the floor heard you moaning my name." Negan chuckled and pulled her back to him.

"I think you're worried it'd be the other way around," Amy challenged, him making them chuckle together as they continued to make out against the wall.

"Either fuckin' way," Negan continued as he playfully pursued her, "I've got a much better room for this type of shit." He glanced over his shoulder at the twin bed. "I'll get someone to bring us up a couple plates from downstairs." Negan looked back to her and she could see he was hesitant but simultaneously insistent when he handed her a ring of keys. "You know where my room is. Go up there, slip into something more comfortable."

Amy took the keys from his hand without breaking eye contact.

"I'll be up after I make my rounds."

"Don't be late," she teased.

Negan kissed her again and then brought his lips to her ear. "I'm going to have to punish you for talking to me like that doll." He slowly slid his hand down the front of her pants and let out a light laugh against her neck when she wrapped both of her arms around him. "Shit.. you're already ready for me."

Amy closed her eyes when his teeth grazed her neck and his fingers explored her further. She didn't want to give up her share of the power in their mutual embrace but knew he could feel the shake in her legs as he continued to tease her.

When he suddenly stopped, Amy's eyes flickered open.

"If I don't stop myself I'm going to fuckin' pull you onto my lap and get this shit started right here."

"So do it." Amy returned the gesture, snaking her hand down his hands. When he closed his eyes and sighed she smiled. "Or will you have the hard time being quiet."

Negan smiled and let his eyes reopen, reluctantly stepping back to remove her hand. "I'm not feeling like a quickie, doll." He raised up her other hand that held the keys he'd given her. "It's the silver one with the double X etched in it." His eyes didn't leave hers as their dark, swelled pupils mirrored one another's.

"I'll search for something more comfortable."

"If all else fails just get naked." He stared her up and down again before letting out a playful, appreciative grunt and then whisked out of the room with a smile.


	16. Cold Dinner

"Negan.." Simon crossed the court yard as Negan paraded across it toward the dining area where food was being served.

He stopped, turning toward Simon as he crossed one foot over the other and placed Lucille on his shoulder.

"I crossed the line." Simon put up his hands. "I shouldn't have said what I said and I shouldn't have pushed you."

"You Simon I don't normally like to underplay your skill set and give you bullshit jobs to do," Negan began, "But, shit, if you bring a couple of plates up to my room we'll fuckin' call it even."

"How many's a couple?"

"Usually that means two genius." Negan held up two fingers and gave a grin when he knew it registered in Simon's mind who the second place was for. "Thanks." He smacked his arm and headed in the opposite direction without looking back. "And make sure you give a hearty fuckin' knock."

…x

When Negan entered his room he was surprised to see Amy sitting on the couch that faced the door overlooking a large map of the area that sat on a table that he referenced sporadically in his planning.

She lifted her eyes to meet his." Are you originally from here?"

Negan clicked the door closed behind him and paced halfway across the room to sit down across from her with the table in between them. "I've lived in Virginia my whole life." He leaned forward and rested both hands on the end of Lucille. "Married.. house on a quiet little dead end street. I was a teacher... coach."

Amy raised her eyebrows and couldn't help but chuckle. "You were a teacher?"

"Hard to believe now, isn't it?" Negan grinned and ran a hand across his beard before setting his bat against the table and leaning back, crossing one leg over the other.

"A little," she admitted. "How long were you married?"

"Eleven years." Negan maintained her eye contact. "Her name was Lucille." When his eyes dropped to the bat briefly, Amy nodded to herself.

"That's kind of an odd tribute."

He nodded slowly and smacked his lips together. "She got me through my everyday life before all this started. I went ahead and fucked a lot of shit up in our marriage and she never left."

"Meaning..."

Negan cleared his throat. "I cheated on her. I spent nights out at the bar with the guys rather than at home having dinner with her. I did a lot of shit that I shouldn't have."

"She's a better woman than me," Amy said. "I would have kicked your ass out."

"She should have."

"What happened to her?"

"Cancer," Negan explained. He sighed and cleared his throat again. "She died right before the shit storm hit." He relived her final days in his mind. "Yeah.. she wasn't built for this. Just like she was there for me in the old world, I would have probably died protecting her in this one." Negan shook his head and picked up the bat, studying it in front of his face for a moment before setting the barrel down on his shoulder. "I loved that woman."

"So why'd you run around on her?"

Negan didn't immediately respond. He thought for an answer that would be valid but there was none. Even the obvious 'because I'm an asshole' didn't cut it. "I don't know," he grumbled quietly.

Amy sighed, "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to pry."

"Yeah you are," he said, "And it's okay. I asked you shit. You get to ask me shit right back."

For a moment they sat in silence until a knock came at the door. Negan glanced at Amy for a quick second and then rose to his feet to answer it, knowing it was Simon with their plates of food.

"Simon!" His behavior changed drastically when greeting him. "What the fuck you got for me?"

"Your trays of food," he replied, glancing over Negan's shoulder at Amy on the couch. "For both of you."

Negan let out a loud chuckle and nodded to Amy. "Chicken and rice good for you, doll?"

"Sounds good," she replied with less enthusiasm.

Negan turned back and accepted the food from Simon, smiling wide and then winked. "Thanks."

"If you need anything else-"

"We're all fuckin' set," he interrupted. "Radio me when the group gets back from collections. Until then only call if there's an emergency."

Amy waved a hand as Negan shewed Simon away and out of the room and then looked across at him when he returned to his seat. "How do you do that? Or why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Change your demeanor. Flip a switch the second Simon or someone comes around."

"People don't follow the weak, honey. What do you want me to do, cry to Simon about my dead fuckin' wife." He let out a huff of a laugh but barely smiled. "Shit, I have to be strong for the sake of the Sanctuary. If I'm not strutting around telling these people that we're on top and shit's gunna be okay then half of them wouldn't even fuckin' believe it. If I break, they break and then this place fails." Negan shook his head. "It's that fuckin' simple."

"So is it all bullshit? The 'we're on the top of the food chain' line you've been selling me."

"Look around. You have food, you have water, you have a damn beer if you want one. We play pool. We have fuckin' air hockey and ice cream." Negan sighed. "So I'll let you make up your own mind about whether that's a line of bullshit."

Amy sighed and decided to back off. "You're right. I'm sorry. I'm not.." She didn't know what she wanted to say and so she shrugged. "I'm sorry."

"All I'm saying is that these people here don't need to just hear it. They need to fuckin' feel it." He thought for a moment. "You play sports in high school?"

"Yeah."

"Well I'm like the guy who riles everybody up in the locker room before the game, and then again at half time and again in a fourth quarter huddle. I need people to buy into all this shit so we stay on top."

"I get it," Amy told him. "I wasn't trying to doubt you. I just.. I have a habit of questioning everything. I'm stubborn, I'm-"

"That's why you're alive," Negan confirmed. "Not because of me. Shit, you probably would've survived that herd at the farm even if we didn't show up." He leaned back and let out a sigh and closed his eyes. "I can't fuckin' seem to get mad at you."

"I survived on my own," Amy said, "But you saved my life."

"And in return you showed me how to drive a standard," he teased, drawing a grin from Amy.

"Glad I could be of service."

Negan grinned back. "Well you can still be of service. Just a different kind."

"Is that all you want me for?" Amy still smiled but was half-serious in her question.

He began to nod but then quickly responded. "No," making himself chuckle from her reaction. Amy looked down with a light laugh and then looked back up to meet his stare.

"We doing this thing or what?" She tried to sound casual.

Negan laughed and rose to his feet, kicking off his boots as he removed his leather jacket. He then made his way to the bed and sat down, putting his arms out to the sides. "They say half the fuckin' fun is in the unwrapping.. so you can remove the rest."

Amy flashed a big smile and then stalked him over to the bed. When she didn't immediately make a move Negan playfully pulled her to him by the waste with a force that made her giggle as he pinned her beneath him on top of the comforter.

"You care if our dinner gets cold?" Negan asked, face to face with her now.

Amy chuckled again and shook her head before pulling him down for a long, needy kiss. "Let's just forget about shit for a little while."

Negan pinned her hands above her head and kissed her again. "I'd fuckin' love that."


	17. Pillow Talk

**Hey everyone.. thanks as always for reading! :)**

* * *

Amy laid with her eyes closed and a smile lingered on her face as she laid entwined with Negan. His body clung to hers, a lair of sweat pinning him to her beneath a thin sheet as he breathed onto her neck in post-coital complacency.

"Forgetting things for awhile feels pretty good," she said, sighing in a breath with her nose.

"I couldn't survive without it." Negan kept his nose pressed against the nape of her neck as he spoke.

Amy suddenly wondered who he might have been 'forgetting things for awhile' with before she had arrived at the Sanctuary, though she quickly acknowledged that it was none of her business.

Nor does it matter, she added in her mind.

"You are damn near perfection," he purred against her ear, making Amy snicker and hold onto him tighter.

Negan huffed a laugh against her and then let out a quiet moan before finally rolling off to one of side of the bed.

"Cigarette would be fuckin' great right now," he added.

Amy scrunched her nose and he looked at her with another chuckle.

"Tell me you've never smoked."

"I dabbled.. in my teens," she admitted.

"That's right you did." He grinned wider and maintained her eye contact. "Bad girl."

"I wasn't a bad girl," Amy indulged him with a laugh.

"I have to disagree with you after that last round honey."

The two of them shared another laugh and Amy's smiling lingered as they laid side by side in silence.

"Have you been here since the beginning?" She asked finally after neither of them said anything for a long moment.

"No. I traveled a bit.. met people on the way and had a small group with Dwight and some others. Simon was running this place when we came here but it was nothing like this."

"Simon ran this place?"

"Almost into the ground," Negan added. "And shit he put a giant target on his back for what he did to another community."

"What did he do?" Amy waited for him to turn and face her.

"That's a talk for another time."

"That's always your answer."

"It's better off keeping that part of Simon's story unsaid. You might look at him differently. I know I fuckin' did but, shit, I can't really throw stones."

Amy's curiosity immediately began to gnaw at her. "Which community?"

"Oceanside."

"You haven't mentioned them."

"That's because no one knows what happened to them.. the survivors anyway." He glanced at her as he spoke the last half of the sentence.

"What'd you do, kill them all?"

"Me? I didn't do shit. This was before my time honey."

"Well then what did Simon do?"

Negan stared at her for a long moment and then tossed the covers to the side with a wink, trying to downplay the story he had already half-told. "Another time." He stood up and headed toward a door across the room.

Amy sighed, prompting him to turn around.

"You're not going to let this shit go," Negan concluded.

She sat up in bed. "No... I'm not."

"Well I hope you're a patient woman."

"I'll ask Simon myself."

Negan stared at her more intently. "You'll be in for some good old fashioned disappointment in your new found friend."

"He's your friend too."

Negan shook his head. "Simon's one of my top guys."

Amy put a hand out to the side. "So who are your friends?"

"I don't have any and I fuckin' like it that way."

"What am I?"

"Right now.." Negan couldn't help but give off a chuckle as he opened the door, "You're a fuckin' pain the ass." Before Amy could rebuttal he disappeared through the doorway.

She sat there for a moment trying to process the half-information that Negan had given her regarding Simon. A part of her wondered if he was embellishing the supposed bad deed that Simon was responsible for. She could sense a bit of possessiveness in the way Negan carried himself when he was around.

Amy squinted to herself when she heard the sound of running water. For several minutes she kept herself busy examining her fingernails, glancing around the room and letting her mind wander in a million different directions. When Negan failed to return to the room she climbed out of bed and wandered in through the mystery door across the room.

"You've got to be kidding me." She folded her arms across her bare chest and began shaking her head with a smirk.

Negan huffed a laugh, looking up to her from where he sat back comfortably in a bath. A small collection of candles were lit, providing the only light in the small, windowless room.

"A man's gotta replenish honey." Negan splashed water into his face and outstretched his arms across the back of the tub with a sigh.

"You really set the mood for yourself in here." She nodded toward the candles.

"No fuckin' light in here in case you haven't noticed."

Amy's eyes scanned the room and then met Negan's again.

"You don't have to wait for an invite," he told her.

"Can you please tell me about Simon?" She still stood, arms folded and both challenging and begging him with her eyes. "So I can make up my own mind about the situation."

Negan sighed and ran a hand through his damp hair. "Join me in here first."

Amy shook her head. "Tell me."

He didn't initially respond but then grumbled. "Fine.. but it's not fuckin' pretty."

She edged her way over to the tub and placed a hand on the porcelain. "Nothing in this world is."

"You are," he teased with a grin, making Amy fight back the smallest smile that she contrasted with serious eyes. "Alright." Negan places his hands behind his head and held her stare, "This is what happened at Oceanside.."


	18. Stay

Parts of Negan were still under lock and key, or so that was how Amy viewed it. He only opened up so much and then the walls he put up would return. Still, she found herself chipping away at the intimate parts of his history while discovering bits and pieces of secrets he kept hidden.

Amy sat comfortably in the bath with her arms wrapped around Negan's upper body from behind as he sat in front her indulging in more of his past than she had expected. For whatever reason Amy sensed that having his back to her as he spoke gave him a sense of protection or security of some sorts. It prevented him from having to make direct eye contact.

"So Simon had all of the men killed at Oceanside?" Amy traced lines on his chest with her fingers as Negan laid his head back on the top of her chest.

"Yeah fucked up shit." He sighed and rested a hand on her knee as it sat exposed in the water. "I've done shit, don't get me wrong. I've killed people in retaliation for killing our people in ruthless fucking ways sometimes." Negan shook his head. "Simon killed those people to kill them."

Amy let out a breath through her nose and tried to process all of what Negan was saying. She had formed her own opinion of Simon that was completely separate from what Negan had revealed about him. Now she knew she had to reevaluate.

"That being said," he went on. "The guy's been nothing but fucking loyal since those days and this place couldn't function without him."

Amy tightened her arms around him and rested her chin gently on his shoulder. She was sure it wasn't easy for him to open up the way he had that evening.

"Negan.." A barely-there voice trickled into the bathroom, stemming from the walkie-talkie on the dresser by the bed. He glanced out the door only moving his eyes, not wanting to move from how he laid against Amy. When his name was said a second time he cursed to himself and swiftly exited the tub, sending water to the tiled floor.

Amy sat there for a moment and listened as Negan cleared his throat from the other room before grumbling back into the receiver.

"Negan here. What is it?"

She glanced around the room and saw a towel bunched up on top of a vanity. Amy gently exited the tub, wrapped the towel around her body and carefully made her way back into the main room. She couldn't help but let her eyes scan the length of his body as he stood wet and naked by the bed holding the radio.

"Collections were made," the voice radioed back.

Negan glanced at Amy and then responded. "Is everything there?"

"Yes. Do you want to come double check?"

"No." Negan eyes Amy again. "As long as all went according to plan that's all I need to fuckin' know."

"All set."

"That's what I like to hear." Negan watched as Amy casually walked over and ran her fingers over the knob of Lucille. She then looked up to meet his stare as he put the radio back down. "You know.. I never feel more fuckin' complete and powerful and shit than when I'm walking around with Lucille on my shoulder, pointing her at people, talking with command.." His voice faded out and he slowly closed the distance between them. "But lately I've been getting that same kind of feeling when I'm with you Amy."

She stared up at him and saw the serious nature of his expression. Still, Amy couldn't help but ask. "Are you comparing me to a baseball bat?"

"Believe it or not that bat is what keeps me going." Negan sighed, keeping his eyes on hers. "Might sound fuckin' ridiculous-"

"It doesn't." Amy nodded and picked up the bat, studying it for a moment before looking back to Negan.

He gently took Lucille from her hand and set it back down before leaning in and kissing her.

"Since the farm," she said quietly, keeping his face in close proximity hers. "You're what keeps me going too."

Negan let his forehead touch hers and waited a moment before picking her up so they were still face to face and kissed her harder.

Amy felt her towel fall to the ground as Negan turned and set her down beneath him on the bed.

"Spend the night with me." Negan lingered above her and let his eyes study hers for a moment.

Amy swallowed hard and was surprised by the butterflies in her stomach that accompanied his light demand. She read his features, smiling quietly to herself from the rare look of vulnerability in his eyes. When his Adam's apple moved up and down she touched the side of his face.

Without waiting another second she nodded and then closed her eyes when he leaned back down and kissed her again.

"Is that a yes?" He whispered against her lips.

Amy dug her fingers into his back and gently ran her other hand through his damp, black hair. For a moment she relished in the intensity of his eyes, the tense strain in his jaw as he waited for her reply, the feel of his body pressed firmly against hers and the simultaneous hot and cold feeling from the bath water that still clung to their bodies.

She wanted to smile but instead she swallowed hard and nodded another time. "Yes."


	19. Win

"I think you should stay," Negan mumbled against the back of Amy's shoulder.

She wanted to turn to him but was far too comfortable laying on the fluffy pillow with him wrapped around her.

"I told you I would," she responded quietly, linking her fingers through his.

"I mean when we go to Alexandria."

Amy pressed her eyebrows together and this time turned around, meeting his stare just a few inches away. "Why?" She shook her head.

"It gets dicey as fuck over there with Rick."

"You don't think I can handle myself?"

"I know you can fuckin' handle yourself." Negan cleared his throat, attempting to relieve himself of the gravelly nature of his voice. "I just.. think you should stay back.. maybe I'll send you to the Kingdom or the Hilltop first. Gregory's a pussy he does what we want."

"Negan." Amy grinned and placed a hand on the side of his face. "I'm going to Alexandria with you."

He stared at her, barely smiling as he admired her fiery spirit and lack of fear. Still, he began to wish he could eat his words that had invited her to go to the most dangerous community. "No." Negan held a small smile as he spoke quietly, "No, you've got to stay here."

"And do what? Hide away?"

"I'll have you be the driving instructor for some of the teenage kids around here."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Come on.."

Negan eyed her more seriously. "Amy.. I want you to stay back."

"But before you were so gung-ho about me going."

"Yeah and now I'm not." Negan stood his ground and continued to stare at her intently.

"Is it too important? You don't trust me."

"No." He closed his eyes and tried to think as he shook his head. "I just changed my fucking mind that's all."

"Within a few hours?"

"Shit, doll, put your gloves down for once." Negan rolled onto his back and laid for a moment in silence before glancing back over at Amy. "Let me win this," he told her.

Amy wasn't blind. She could read the signs of a man, Negan included, when he began to feel protective of her. In that moment he looked at her in a way that felt different from the carefree, playful nature of their typical interactions.

"Alright," she agreed."

"It has nothing to do with a lack of trust," he reiterated.

"I know," Amy recognized. "But you can't hide me away from all the danger out there Negan. Eventually it comes to your doorstep."

Negan continued to stare at her for a moment and then readjusted to eye the uneven brushstrokes on the ceiling. When he didn't say anything back Amy rolling herself over so her upper body rested on his chest. His eyes met hers again.

"Tell me what you're thinking about," she demanded with quiet authority.

Negan outwardly maintained his composed demeanor though inside a flood of emotions were gnawing at his core. He never broke eye contact with her and responded as simply as possible with no intent to elaborate. "You."

Amy smiled, resting her chin on top of her hands as she still looked up from his chest. "You're a smooth talker. I just might let you get into my pants with answers like that."

Negan tipped his mouth up in a half-grin and then accepted a kiss that she initiated. He raised his eyebrows when she pinned his hands above his head and then closed his eyes as she took on a dominant position on top of him.

Amy felt his hands squeeze hers as she joined herself to him beneath the covers and leaned down to touch his lips with her own again.

"I miss driving with you," Negan whispered, grunting lowly just after as she began to ride him.

She smiled and kissed along his collarbone, not stopping the gentle rhythm that left him with a chorus of quiet moans with each movement she made.

"You still lied to me," Amy teased with a fleeting soft laugh that twisted Negan's mouth up into a smile.

"I'm- fuck.." He groaned as she purposely picked up the pace and failed to finish his short response.

"You're what?" She continued to tease, moaning just after from the way he felt inside of her.

Negan squeezed her hands harder as they were still locked above his head. All he could reply with were a string of unintelligible curse words between more grunts and groans as he felt Amy begin to lose herself in the moment.

"Shit don't stop honey," he choked out. When he attempted to free his hands she put more pressure on them, securing him to the bed beneath her.

Negan knew he could have won the game of dominance, though a wave of desire rushed through his body when she held his hands in place.

Amy felt a pleasure in her core each time Negan's fingers slid in and out of hers on top of the pillow, gripping her hard until his knuckles were white. With every thrust of her hips he moaned louder and it contributed to the impending orgasm that brewed inside of her.

Her face hovered over his as she lunged forward at a faster pace. When Negan looked up he had to touch her, freeing a hand to trace her face before running a hand down over her breast.

Amy placed a hand over his against her and moaned.

"Come for me baby," Negan's quiet, gravelly voice sent chills down her back as he recognized the look on her face and subtle movements of her body.

Amy didn't hold back, letting herself go on top of him as he thrusted up to add to the intensity of her climatic moment.

"Fuck." Negan let out a guttural moan when he felt her tighten against him, and his body stiffened as he finished just a moment after her.

They remained connected, both alternating heavy, decompressing breaths that echoed one another. When Amy unlinked her hand with his Negan wrapped his arm around her bare back and kissed her when she sunk down onto him.

"We are just too fuckin' good at that shit," he said, making Amy chuckle and sigh as she came down off the high he had given her. Negan let out a deep breath, "Fuck."

She laid partially on his chest and smiled. "You know I was going to proposition to you with sex to let me go to Alexandria. But that made me surrender instead."

He let out a light flutter of laughter and ran his fingers down toward the base of her back. "Well I'm glad we're on the same page, doll." Negan smiled wide as they made eye contact and acknowledged quietly that he had won their disagreement about going to the community. "I win."

"I let you," she whispered, keeping a wide grin on his face.

"I know."


	20. Speechless

Amy couldn't help but smile the day following her night spent with Negan. Every pleasure sensor in her body had actively contributed to boosting her mood as she went about her daily routine, this time unloading supplies from trucks with some of the others. As bad as she tried to fight her feelings for the man who seemed all wrong for her at first impression, Amy was unable to deny the attachment she had developed for Negan over time. She was more than confident that those feelings were mutual.

"Hey." Simon nodded to Amy holding an oversized box. The tops of liquor bottles rose above the cardboard perimeter.

"Hey Simon." She flashed a quick smile and tried not to judge based on the information that Negan had given her. Amy wanted to get Simon's side for herself.

"Feel like getting that second box of booze?" He asked, nodding to a second container on the ground. "I'll show you where it goes and we can probably take a shot."

Amy gave a light laugh and nodded. "Sure." She scooped up the second box from the ground and followed a step behind as Simon made his way inside. A part of her was hesitant but she decided to not be a coward and so she started the conversation she knew she had to have with him. "Hey, can I talk to you about something?"

Simon glanced over his shoulder as he continued to walk. "Yeah."

"What, uh.. what's the deal with Oceanside? Why don't we work with them anymore?"

He stopped and thought a moment before turning around. "How do you know about Oceanside?"

"Negan told me," Amy answered honestly, prompting Simon to sneer.

"They weren't cooperating. Oceanside was before Negan's time. He doesn't know shit about what actually happened or how we interact with them."

"Did you kill them?"

Simon's face became more stone-like now. "People were killed because we had to send a message. Just like Negan does now with all of these communities. You know why Rick's people are so difficult?" He waited a few seconds before continuing on as Amy listened, "Because Negan took a bat to two of their heads and beat them to death in front of the rest of their people."

Amy cleared her throat and wanted to speak up and defend him but she wasn't sure what to say. In her heart she had to believe that the circumstances were vastly different.

Simon shook his head and eyed the ceiling for a moment before looking back to Amy. "Come on. We have to make a quick pit stop with some of this liquor. I forgot we have to stock the bar."

"There's a bar?"

"Not open to the public." Simon continued his march on and Amy kept up, walking side by side with him as he led the way to their first destination. "Ever been over here?" He asked when they rounded into a hallway with doors on both sides.

Amy looked around. "No. I don't think so."

Simon cleared his throat and nodded with his head. "It's the open door over here on the left." He entered the room without looking back at her and Amy was about to try apologizing, sensing Simon was aggravated as a result of their conversation.

"Simon.." She thought about what to say but then stopped and looked around as they entered the room. A bar sat off to the left. Couches were scattered about the room and another door was in the back. Women who had been sitting around prior to their entry abruptly rose to their feet, some of them immediately offering to stock the bar and take the boxes out of their hands.

"Thank you ladies," Simon said, handing over the box. They issued multiple "You're Welcomes" and hurried to get the small task completed.

Amy took in their their scantily-clad attire and looked to Simon for answers. Without having to verbally ask the question, he answered it.

"These are the wives."

...x

Negan whistled as he strolled around the Sanctuary, pleased to find that everything was in order. He toyed with the idea of inviting Amy to stay with him again and contemplated radioing for her. When he saw her round out into the front of the main building, however, he grinned and decided to approach her instead.

"Why don't you call it a day, doll," Negan told her, still sporting a smile. "You worked hard enough."

Amy flashed a fleeting smile that quickly faded and raised her eyebrows. "Okay. Thanks." She nodded and passed by him, prompting Negan to stop and glance over his shoulder. When she continued to walk without appearing as if she had the intent of stopping he hurried to catch up to her.

"Bad fuckin' day?"

"Not particularly." She barely glanced at him and continued to walk.

"Can you fuckin' stop for a second?"

Amy sighed, stopping in her tracks and put her hands on her hips. She didn't say anything but simply stared up at him.

Negan tried to read her body language and squinted as he studied her up and down. When he failed to speak Amy grew slightly impatient.

"What do you want Negan?"

"What the fuck is with the tone?" He glanced around the vacant area and then looked back to her. "Last I saw you you were practically skipping out of my fucking room this morning. And since you said you didn't have a bad day forgive me if I'm a little fucking confused."

"Would you say you're completely full of shit or just partially?"

"Why don't you say whatever it is that's on your mind instead of-"

"I'm not the jealous type, really, I'm not," Amy began, "And I honestly have no fucking idea what it is that's been going on between us, but I'm not going to be one of fifty. And I'm certainly not going to be lied to."

"Lied to about what?"

"The string of women you have waiting to suck your dick on a moment's notice. The whore house you keep downstairs in a hallway you just never thought to take me down."

"Did Simon-"

"I delivered boxes of vodka and gin and whiskey and whatever the fuck else. No.. Simon didn't do anything. I found out on my own." She let out a disgusted laugh and shook her head, "What'd you think I wasn't going to find out?" Before he could answer she went on, "I'd be fine with it if I found out there was someone else here you were sleeping with besides me. We haven't established any rules to whatever the hell this is, Negan. But you're telling me those women volunteered to have their role at the Sanctuary be to fuck you? That's a fucking job here?" She was unable to keep from raising her voice. When he stood there staring at her like a dog with its tail between its legs Amy shook her head and left him standing there as she stormed away.

Negan stood alone in the courtyard and watched her go. He had the urge to call her name and chase after her but he didn't. He decided to give her the space she wanted despite the sinking feeling in stomach that felt worse than if he had taken a punch.

The hopes he had for a repeat of the night before went out the window and a part of him feared he would never get Amy back into his good graces. For the first time he didn't know what to do or what to say and so he just stood there alone.


	21. Work

Amy wasn't the type to sit around and mope. There was a part of her that felt like her heart had been ripped out, though her mind won the battle and she decided to be who she had always been - the strong, level-headed woman, not the girl who cried over a man. She knew she could have indulged in the wave of disappointment though rather she decided to keep herself occupied and useful.

Despite the bittersweet memories that lingered in the garage, Amy knew she could be of help there and so that was where she went.

When she entered there were four men doing odd jobs. Two were fill cars with gas from oversized red containers, one was hooking up jumper cables from one car to the next and the fourth was behind the wheel of an old Volkswagen. Dwight stood overseeing it all, puffing on a cigarette by the open bay door.

"Dwight." Amy approached him drawing just quick looks from the others. "What can I do?"

He blew smoke into the air and let the cigarette sit in between his first two fingers. "As far as.."

"In here," she elaborated, "I know my way around a garage."

He eyed her for a moment. "Did Negan send you?"

"No. But right now this is where I'm most useful. I'd like to help out. I have no other work assignments for the day."

Dwight thought for a moment. A part of him felt as though he should radio for Negan but another part of him felt he was more than capable of making the decision for himself.

"Fine," he agreed, "Extra set of hands never hurts. We have oil, believe it or not, so we might as well use it and get whatever life we can out of these old clunkers." Dwight flicked his cigarette and waved her with him, blowing the last of the smoke into the air. "Ever do an oil change?"

"Yes," Amy explained, "Which car?"

Dwight walked her over toward a set of jack stands and bent down to pick one of them up. "Here." He handed it over and then picked up the second one, "You and I can work on this Jeep."

"Great," she said with mild enthusiasm, prompting him to look back. "Thanks Dwight."

"Thanks for putting you to work?"

Amy realized her polite gesture must have sounded odd but she nodded. "Yeah."

..x

Amy found herself feeling better as she worked, rolling in and out from under the car. The on-the-go nature of the afternoon had kept her busy in a way that didn't feel like work. Unlike most of the women she knew, it was cars and the hands-on dirty work that kept her going. She had always felt like she didn't quite fit the norms of what a lot of her friends enjoyed. Shopping, braiding hair and getting dressed up we're never much of interest to her. Amy's calling had always been in the rugged outdoorsy types of activities. A part of her credited her survival in the new world to the lifestyle she had lived all of her life.

Throughout the afternoon Amy had lost herself in her work so when she heard Negan's voice as he entered the garage she wanted to stay underneath the car she was working on. When Dwight unintentionally revealed her whereabouts, even pointing out her good work, Amy wanted to float away and hide.

She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment, resting a hand on her sweat-damp forehead for a moment before turning her head when she heard the scraping crunch of Negan's boots along the floor.

While she began to acknowledge the hurt from Simon's revelation about Negan's room of other lovers, anger began to override that feeling.

"I told her she didn't have to," Dwight said to him.

Amy shook her head, not wanting to be bothered. A part of her wished she still had her farm. The land they owned had once felt endless and getting the much needed space she craved now would have been possible had she been at home.

The Sanctuary was beginning to feel like home but that warmth she had experienced in her friendship and courtship with Negan was replaced with vastly different emotions.

When Amy opened her eyes she saw Negan's boots as he walked beside the car. Rather than let the anxiety of the moment grow she decided to face him and ducked out from under the car.

Negan's eyes immediately met hers and she matched his stare without saying anything.

"You didn't have to-" he began but she cut him off.

"I wanted to," Amy said with a confident nod.

Dwight looked back and forth between them before taking Amy's place beneath the car.

"Can we talk outside?" Negan asked quietly.

"What about?"

He gave her a look but she waited for his response. "About the last thing we talked about."

"I'd rather not." She headed toward the oversized bay door simply so the others wouldn't hear her business. When Negan followed she felt like she could have unleashed on him again but she kept her composure.

"Give me a chance to explain."

"You has long enough to explain," Amy said to him. "And if I didn't stumble upon that on my own then I still would be doting on you and sleeping in your bed like an idiot. I found out on my own, and you know what.." She thought for a moment, "You don't owe me anything because we had nothing to begin with."

"You know that's not fuckin' true, Amy."

"We got along, we hit it off and we slept together. It happens. We had a little thing and it was.. great; but now things have changed a little bit."

"Those women, they.." Negan grew frustrated looking for a way to not sound like a complete asshole.

"They what? They don't mean anything?" Amy shook her head. "That's worse. At least if you had some type of connection with them there would be one part of this that wasn't disrespectful and shallow. But like you said, you don't have friends and you like it that way."

Negan found himself speechless again. She was right. Amy stood before him calling him out on his bullshit more than anyone had in his life. It made the moment all the more gut wrenching for him and made his growing attachment to her stronger.

"You owe me nothing," she added calmly.

"I don't feel that way."

"I do." Amy put her hands on her hips and looked around. She then looked him back in the eye. "I'm going to Alexandria tomorrow."

"No you're not."

"You might have all these people under your thumb here, Negan, but I'm not that type of person." She shook her head. "The only way I'm not going is if you kick me out or kill me." Amy began to slowly walk backwards. "Otherwise I'll see you bright and early tomorrow."


	22. Business

Amy lost herself in a book in her room for the better part of an hour. Just as her eyes were starting to get heavy there was a knock at the door.

"Shit." She whispered the word to herself and knew it was most likely either Negan or Simon. She didn't want to see either of them but she knew ignoring the knock wouldn't make the person on the other side go away.

When she made her way to the door and flew it open a rush of relief filtered through her body when Arat stood there.

"Negan wanted me to give you this." Arat handed over a piece of paper. "It's a list of what we're supposed to be getting."

Amy glanced at the paper. "Thanks. What time are the trucks leaving?"

"Around noon. I'd be there thirty minutes early."

"Okay thanks. Is there anything else I should know?"

"Negan said to be on your A-Game." Arat shrugged. "But I think that's a given."

She nodded. "Right."

"Okay well radio if you need anything else." Arat gave a wave, "See you tomorrow."

Amy knew that going to Alexandria was a big deal, and so the nonchalant nature of Arat making her rounds almost made her feel more anxious. When she closed the door she made her way back to her bed and glanced over the list, attempting to ingrain the items in her mind before tucking it under a folded T-shirt she planned to wear the following day.

For the first time Amy acknowledged how bad she needed a friend. She wished there was someone, anyone, to talk to. Negan had been the person she was closest to by a long shot and now she felt more alone than ever.

She sighed, stripped off her jeans and changed into a pair of comfortable shorts before sliding under the covers. In the darkness she laid there for several minutes feeling her ear drums pound with each best of her heart. As she really began to focuson it it sounded deafening. When another knock came at the door it was like the louder drumming in her ears abruptly stopped and reality succumbed her again.

Amy tossed the covers to the side and inched the door open this time. When she saw Negan standing there she closed her eyes and let out a loud sigh.

"I'm here to give you information about Alexandria," he informed her, speaking quickly so she wouldn't slam the door in his face. When she opened it wider he went on. "If you're going to go with us then there are some things I want you to know."

Amy kept her eyes focused on his without speaking for several seconds before allowing him in. "Arat came with the grocery list."

"Good." He stiffly made his way around the room before choosing to lean against the wall. "There's a kid.. Carl. You can't underestimate him. Kid's wise beyond his years and a little badass. He snuck in here once and tried to take me out."

"Carl.. got it." She stares back at him. "Anything else?"

"I mean it, Amy. I'm talking business now. You can hate me all you want but if you want in on this shit then listen."

"I'm listening."

"He's fearless, wears a cowboy hat, about 16 years old. Then Rick, I'll deal with him, but he's pulled shit before that compromised all of us at the last minute. I'll address him by name so you know exactly who he is. The women there are all badasses - Michonne especially. She's Rick's woman and she has your attitude and desire and will. She has dreads and carries a big ass sword. There are others but those are some of the main players."

Amy softened her features a bit and decided she had to be able to talk business if she was going to contribute as she wanted to. "That's helpful. Thank you."

Negan nodded. "Don't stray from your group of people that you ride in with. They're really unpredictable here."

"I'll stick to the plan," Amy assured him.

"That's all I ask."

There was a moment of silence and a part of Amy was waiting for Negan to start talking about the harem. When he didn't say anything or go to leave she wasn't wholly sure what to say or do. There was a part of her that wanted to rehash what had surfaced earlier but there was a bigger part of her that was too hurt and prideful to let him speak.

"Shit gets dangerous out there and, fuck, no one knows what tomorrow will fuckin' bring these days," Negan said finally, "So I'm just going to say one thing and then I'll leave you alone." He cleared his throat and began to speak right away so she couldn't deny him, "Those women did volunteer to do that and for awhile I indulged in it. I thought that any day I could be dead and since Lucille died I had no one. I really haven't trusted anyone since since she died. Do you think Simon or Dwight would really give a fuck if I died? Shit no." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "I enjoy the time I spend with you and that hasn't happened to me in the form of love, sex or friendship in a long fucking time. I didn't fuck around with any of those women since the first week you were here. I know that doesn't make it right and the way I've acted in the past makes me a-"

"An asshole," Amy finished.

"Yeah." Negan nodded. "But I don't want to lose your friendship. I haven't had even the slightest bit of emotional attachment to anything but Lucille." He gripped the bat and twisted it on his shoulder. "And that's pretty fucked up I guess."

Amy let out a sigh through her nose. The anger was beginning to be replaced with sadness again that she had worked hard to suppress.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about all that shit. It's not the easiest thing to bring up. The shit that happened with us was pretty fuckin' sudden and I got wrapped up in it. I don't want the other women, Amy, I-"

Amy felt her emotions beginning to overcome her and so she interrupted him while her voice was still strong. "You should go."

Negan stared at her looking defeated for a moment before clearing his throat, running a hand over his beard and then headed for the door with Lucille on his shoulder. "Trucks leave at twelve-fifteen." He slowly opened the door and exited without looking back, gently closing it behind him.

For several seconds he stood outside of the room and hoped by some chance that Amy would open it, accept his apology and welcome him back in. When it didn't happen he wasn't surprised, though as he finally began to walk away he stopped.

Without intent to eavesdrop he heard Amy's quiet sobs from behind the door. For the first time since his late wife, Negan began to feel deep regret.

He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes, feeling his stomach sink. "Fuck."


	23. Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven

When Amy headed down toward the area where the cars were typically loaded up she began to sense that something was off.

Negan abruptly popped up out of nowhere, making her jump, as he pulled her by the arm. "Go up to my room." He placed keys in her hand.

"What?" She asked, "What are you-"

"I'll explain later but just do it."

"No." Amy shook her head but was beginning to see the seriousness in his features.

"Fuck, Amy, they're here at the gates armed and fucking loaded."

"Who is?"

"Rick," he hissed, "And others I don't fucking know yet but they've got a parade of cars shielded up and things could go really fucking wrong."

Amy wasn't sure what to say. She didn't know what they were actually dealing with but she didn't want to sit back while it all unfolded. Despite how unhappy she was with Negan she didn't want him on the chopping block front and center. When she heard a voice bellow his name Negan glanced over his shoulder before looking back at her.

He closed the keys in her hand. "Please." Before Amy could respond he hurried away out a door that led to the front of the Sanctuary.

"What the fuck.." Amy whispered the phrase to herself and despite his words she glanced out a window and listened.

Negan, Simon and a handful of others stood together overlooking a collection of cars and trucks that appeared as though they were shielded with armor.

Amy could tell by Negan's jovial voice that he was putting on the facade that all was fine and that he wasn't worried by the impending attack. By the way he interacted with her, she knew it was bullshit and this time she prayed that the people of Alexandria were swayed. It wasn't until Rick's countdown that Amy truly felt like things were truly about to go bad, and she wasn't mistaken. He hadn't even counted down four numbers when gunfire erupted and the Saviors began diving for cover.

"Shit!" She ducked below the window, initially placing her hands over her ears as shards of glass began to split, shatter and crash over the top of her.

Amy laid flat on the ground, switching her hands to cover her head until the shards glass stopped raining down from above. She huffed a deep breath and felt her heart pounding in her chest. As bad as she wanted to look out the shattered window she knew it wouldn't be smart and so she began to arm crawl over the broken glass.

"Fuck.." Amy breathed the word as her arms and abdomen were repeatedly cut with each movement.

When Simon burst in through the door with Arat at his heels he hurried to help Amy up from the ground.

"Let's go!" He shouted, grabbing her by the arm.

"Where's Negan?"

Simon didn't respond but kept pulling at her as they ran, ducking below the level of the windows. When she freed herself from his grasp he turned to her and shouted her name but Amy took off in the opposite direction and headed for the front doors as the gunfire slowed. Glass continued to rain around her as she eased her way outside, peering around the immediately area. When she didn't see him laying dead somewhere she felt a twinge of hope. There was a part of her that wanted to shout out his name though she knew it wasn't smart. Rather she carefully scaled the staircase, prepared to go searching, though came face-to-face with a stranger wearing a priest collar.

At first neither of them said a word and while both brandished weapons neither he nor she raised them.

"Come with me," the man requested, waving a hand at her.

"Who.. who are you?"

"For your safety, just-"

"Are you with them?" Amy raised her gun now without the intent of using it.

"I'm Father Gabriel," he informed her, putting his hand up now as he glanced to the side with the eruption of more gunfire. "Come with me so you don't get hurt."

"I don't see you being in the position of power here."

"We have the numbers," he informed her.

"Where's Negan?"

Gabriel raised his eyebrows, knowing Rick was hunting him as they spoke. "He ran. I don't know."

"Why are you doing this?" Amy asked, gritting her teeth.

"I'll explain once-" More gunfire made them both crouch and Amy went running off again, certain that the priest wouldn't shoot her in the back.

"Negan!" She shouted his name now and looked in all directions as she went. Amy didn't know if Father Gabriel has followed her but instinctively she knew he wasn't a threat to her life. "Negan!"

More gunshots made her stop momentarily but she pressed on until she saw finally saw him ducked behind some debris. Before she could attempt to get to him she saw another man firing shots in his direction.

Another time she shouted for him and this time Negan spotted her standing there and waved a hand. "Go!" He shouted, putting his hands over his head as bullets began to ping off of his hiding spot.

Amy was about to attempt running to his aid, though stood in awe momentarily as his attacker held up a camera, sending a Polaroid inching out of the end of it. Without another thought the man fled with a fleeting grin and Amy rushed to Negan's side.

"I told you to fuckin' go upstairs," he said when she reached him.

"Shut up!" Amy helped him to his feet and they began making their way through the shambles that their home was in. "We have to get inside."

"Rick's fucking shooting-"

"He's gone," Amy informed him then added sternly, "Let's go."

Negan trusted Amy's claims and decided to do something that never came natural to him - follow.

"Oh shit.." Amy stopped, instinctively positioning herself in front of Negan and let her mouth hang open.

He followed her gaze and felt an anger begin to cripple his body. "Fucking dickwad asshole."

The two of them could only stare ahead as walkers paraded in through the open gates of the Sanctuary.


	24. Sanctuary

For a moment Negan just stared angrily at the herd and shook his head, though began to move when Amy spotted a trailer and pointed.

"Come on!" She ran a step ahead, hurrying toward the only source of shelter that was available and flung the door open. Walkers began to pour in from all directions, stumbling in through the openings of the Sanctuary's main building and filling the courtyard.

Negan looked around as the undead closed in on them, rushing inside behind Amy before finally closing the door as the walker hands began to pound against the sides. Just like that, the Sanctuary was no longer a sanctuary. It was a mass grave of the walking dead as they came to claim Negan's small corner of the world that he had taken so long to build up.

"Well, fuck.." He took a breath and sat down with his back against the wall and closed his eyes for a moment. The nonchalant nature of his voice screamed defeat and he ran a hand through his hair.

Amy stood in the center of the trailer, looking around with her hands on her hips. The growls and snarls collected like a chorus as the walkers unsuccessfully pounded at the outside walls in an attempt to get to the two of them. The adrenaline shot from the moment still lingered, sending her thoughts into a sporadic overload for a moment as she began to calm down through a series of deep breaths. Outside the window above Negan's head there was a sea of dead eyes staring back, all collectively in seek of the same goal.

"What now?" she was more talking out loud than directly to Negan, though a part of her hoped he had some valiant plan in his back pocket to relieve them of their current, bleak situation.

He opened his eyes and looked up at her, "You tell me, doll."

"Don't call me doll."

"Oh, we're back to that." Negan nodded, "Alright."

"I don't want to argue with you. Not now."

"Why the fuck were you outside?" He asked nonchalantly. "Is it strictly pride or do you not care whether you live or die?"

"Pride?" Amy huffed a laugh, "You want to talk to me about pride?"

Negan thought for a moment and then let a slow grin spread across his face, "Touché." He cleared his throat, "But really.. which is it?"

"I wanted to be in the loop and when they all started shooting and you didn't come inside with the others I started to think the worst."

"Doesn't seem like you like me too much these days," he told her, "So why bother-"

"You saved me," Amy told him, "I was returning the favor." She glanced out the windows again, "Only it doesn't look like we're in a great spot to thrive right now."

"Yep," Negan sighed and outstretched his legs, crossing one foot over the other and rested his hands behind his head. "Looks like we'll be in here for a while."

She didn't comment back and made her way to the wall across from him, sitting down with her knees bent and rested her elbows on them.

"Amy.." he began, but she stopped him.

"Don't."

"We're fuckin' stuck in here together," Negan went on. "You're a strong woman who doesn't need my bullshit but I'm just asking you for a chance to fuckin' listen." When she looked at him he went on with a single request, "Please."

She sighed and shook her head. Against her better judgment she motioned with her hand for him to go on. "Fine."

"I told you about Lucille. I told you the good and the bad. I was a shitty husband but she was a perfect wife and losing her felt like a I had been stabbed in the fuckin' chest. I lost more than anyone could ever realize when I lost Lucille. She kept me fuckin'... human." Negan scratched the back of his head and looked away as he spoke, "I started this place and people were assigned jobs. I started fucking around with a few of the women here, and honestly I enjoyed the freedom of it. I told them they didn't have to work, they could spend their free hours with me and in the beginning that's about as deep or shallow as it was. Then a few more women caught my eye and wanted the same deal. I said okay and soon I had all these women at my disposal. Pride.. fuck yeah. I felt like a damn ladies man, Hugh Hefner motherfucker."

Amy rolled her eyes, cracking a barely there smile that she hid from him and shook her head again, but allowed him to go on.

"Call it a cop out, but I knew that any damn day could be the day that someone took me out, or I got fuckin' stuck somewhere and these undead assholes would make a damn meal out of me." Negan grinned for a moment, finally looking back to her, "So I fuckin' rolled with it. I justified that shit and had my wives ready to do whatever the hell I wanted when I wanted. For a while it satisfied me, but shit even that gets old after a while. When I met you, or more specifically when we stole that fucker's Jeep in the rain.. that was the day when something changed. I enjoyed you.. and us.. and all of the shit in between. I didn't tell you about the other women because I didn't know where to even fuckin' start.. and I was in the process of changing my dynamic with them all together."

"What do you mean?"

Negan looked her directly in the eye. "Since the night in the garage I haven't slept with any of them. And-"

Amy hadn't anticipated it but she felt a sudden tightness in her chest and then began to cry.

For a moment Negan didn't know what to do. He just sat there with his mouth partially open and eyebrows raised, and was relieved when Amy suddenly let out a deep breath.

She dried the tears on her streaked face, sniffed in once and then tightened her jaw. "Negan, you're the only person left on this earth who I really talk to. There's Simon a little and a few of the others but.." Amy shook her head, "You, if nothing else, were my friend."

"I think you feel more than that."

"I do," she admitted, "But a friend in a world like this can sometimes go longer than even a lover. So when I felt that you blatantly lied to me-"

"I didn't lie," Negan began, but decided it was wrong to cut her off. "I'm.. sorry. Go ahead."

"I felt betrayed by you," Amy admitted, "And you were the last person on earth who meant something to me. So.. yeah.. yeah I don't know how to really feel."

"I'd say I want us to start over but shit, I think that would be eliminating too many good fuckin' laughs. If we lose this place today and we're out on the road on foot I want you right fuckin' next to me. I don't deserve it, I broke your trust and I fucked up. But we could die right here, it could be tomorrow or fifty years from now. You are my something real honey. And I'll have a harder time than you know dealing with fucking this up if you decide you want nothing to do with me." Negan folded his hands in front of his face. "I heard you crying last night before I walked away and I couldn't fuckin' sleep. I feel like shit that I was the reason, and seeing you break down in here.." He shook his head, "I've killed people and it's bothered me less."

Amy had a number of things going through her mind that lingered on the top of her tongue. She didn't know which would win the battle and come out first, if any.

"Why, uh.." her voice shook but she powered through it, "Why was those women still down there?"

"I hadn't been down there in awhile. I wasn't sure how to even go about telling them that their role as my wives was done. I was thinking of letting them remain doing what they were doing minus the fucking part just for my status quo.. if I'm being honest."

"That's the one thing about you I just don't understand. The status quo."

"It's how I maintained this place and how I've stayed alive. I know you don't understand and-"

"I don't understand the pressure you're under to keep this place going," Amy admitted, "So I'm sorry I keep judging you for that. I.." She abruptly stood up and began to walk toward a lone door at the far end of the trailer when she felt herself tear up again. "I'll be right back."

Negan watched her go through the door and closed his eyes as his head leaned back again. The only thing he was left with were the sounds of walkers growling and scratching at the window behind him.


	25. Confessional

Amy got herself together, deciding they had to come up with a plan to escape the trailer. She stared out a window in the small space she had confined herself too and stared at the mob of walkers. The only thing that separated them from her was a pane of glass. The thought should have been terrifying but for some reason Amy felt numb to it. Living amongst the dead had become so routine that it felt as normal as going to the grocery store had before the world turned its dark corner.

Negan's words penetrated her heart and Amy thought about their relationship as she continued to stare at the walkers clawing at the window. She wondered if she should give him a break and take the situation for what it was. Sure, he had been having sex with a handful of women, but the world as they knew it was over. Was it fair to judge him for his choices prior to meeting her? His wife died, he struggled on his own for awhile and then he built up the Sanctuary only to have these women throw themselves at him. What was the harm in that?

Amy shook her head, noting that he hadn't disclosed any of that information to her. Still, if he was, indeed, being honest about not sleeping with them since they had crossed the line in their own relationship then was it so crazy to forgive him?

There was a light knock at the door and Amy swallowed hard. She took a deep breath and felt her stomach knot up when Negan's spoke quietly.

"Amy."

She hesitated before responding. "Yeah."

"I'm sorry," Negan said sincerely. "I haven't been this sorry in a long time." His voice was low and gravelly. "Hell, I haven't put in the effort into anybody but myself in long time." He cleared his throat, letting a melancholy tone hang in his tone. "I know I don't deserve it but we could be fucked here. Not just in here but the Sanctuary, we could lose it. I never thought it would happen but we could fuckin' lose this place. Now that I've found you I don't want to lose you. I don't want to start over, I want to fix it."

Amy closed her eyes, fighting with her pride for a moment before the reality of the situation hit her. She reached for the door knob and slowly opened the door, relieving them both of the confessional-style conversation they had begun.

When the door opened and she stood face-to-face with Negan there was nothing she could say. Her feelings were still too mixed up to make any kind of decision. Rather than say anything she pulled him to her and hugged him, resting her chin on his shoulder as she pulled him tightly against her.

Negan closed his eyes and bowed his head, not knowing if he was crossing a line by leaving a fleeting kiss on her shoulder as she secured his body to hers.

Amy didn't let go. She just stood there and held him for a long moment until a decompressing breath she let out separated them.

Negan didn't know what the sensual gesture meant but he was thankful that he was somewhat back on Amy's good graces. He wanted to pull her to him and kiss her hard but he used all of his energy to restrain himself.

"We have to get out of here," he said, shifting his mind back to business. "I honestly have no fuckin' idea how."

Amy nodded and headed back into the main room. She paced the length of the nearly empty space with little to go with. There were no radios to communicate, no weapons; there was nothing

When a window broke and one of the walkers came through partway, Amy jumped and Negan hurried to pull her back, positioning himself in front of her. Without warning he reached for a stray broom handle on the floor and began slamming away at the walker's head until it was nothing but splattered blood and guts across the floor. Both of them stood there for a moment as the rest of the mob competed to get to broken window. Their pack mentality is what kept a second one from entering.

A lightbulb went off in Amy's head and she glanced at Negan, ignoring the growls and clawing walkers by the shattered window.

"I might have an idea.," she told him, "And it sucks.. but it worked.. once." Negan shifted his eyes to meet hers and Amy went on, squatting beside the dead walker. When she reluctantly swiped a handful of blood from the body and began rubbing it on her arms, he squinted his eyes.

"I'm not trying to be a dick but what the fuck are you doing?" He asked.

Amy continued to rub the blood over her body. "A friend of mine was stuck in a convenience store," she explained, "And he did this to get away from a mob as his last resort."

"And it worked.."

"It worked." Amy held up a hand and waved for Negan to give her the broom handle. She then proceeded to slam it into the next walker's head as it began to claw its way into the trailer.

Negan decided to put his trust into her and knelt down beside the two mangled walker bodies. Without another moment of hesitation he followed her lead and began covering himself in the guts and blood of the undead.

Amy sighed, trying not to gag as she applied it to her face and then finally stood up when both of them were covered head to toe.

Negan inched his way to the door, peering out at the destruction to his community and decided it was now or never. Their options were minimal and so he hoped for both of their lives that Amy's trick would work.

Amy let out a sigh and the two of them shared a look. When Negan reached for the door handle without breaking eye contact she gave a simple nod.

He glanced down at his hand now, knowing there was no going back. The reality was that they were either about to break loose and move forward, or be ripped apart.

"Open it." Amy's words of encouragement were all he needed and Negan flung the door open to meet the hungry eyes of hundreds of walkers. 


	26. We Are Negan

A rush of adrenaline - that's what Amy credited to her ability to tune out the snarls and growls all around her; her ability to take the first step into the sea of walkers; the tunnel vision that led her eyes straight to a big, gray door that led into the Sanctuary building.

Negan's hand found hers as they ducked through the crowd, being examined by the undead as they attempted to blend in. The stench of the dead could have made Amy gag but her eyes never left the door in the distance.

For the first time Amy recognizes true uncertainty in Negan's eyes. She took the lead and carved a path with her body that sliced through the mob of walkers.

Negan trusted Amy. As they cruised so intensely controlled through the mess that had become of his former home, he felt a blanket-like security being side by side with her. Despite knowing her for far less time than others who he kept high on his pecking order, Negan felt a natural trust in Amy. It was why he took the rare back seat on her mission to get them to safety.

He took a half second amidst the chaos to look around. Smoke rose from somewhere in the distance; the fences were down in many key areas to where his eyes could see; all the windows were filled with bullet holes; and the obvious walkers had inhabited the Sanctuary. Things were a mess and Negan knew in that moment that things weren't going to be the same.

Amy wanted to tell Negan that they were almost there and to keep fighting so-to-speak, though she didn't dare make a sound amongst the undead. The feel of their bony arms, the smell of the rotten flesh and menacing growls had her fists clenched tight and jaw clenched tighter.

We're going to make it, she knew. It wasn't a question. They were going to make it to the door. They were going to be safe. All that came after was a giant looking question mark but they would be safe in the moment to come.

Little goals, Amy continued to talk to herself in her mind until they managed to open the big gray door that drew eyes from the surrounding walkers.

She nodded with her head as her fingers curled around the silver doorknob and Negan slunk inside with Amy a step behind him as she gently closed the door without a single walker managing to follow them inside.

The two of them stood silently still for a moment, both finally releasing a deep breath they had pushed down deep in their trek across the courtyard. Negan leaned against the wall, closing his eyes a moment while Amy placed a hand on her forehead and paced a few slow steps as the growls echoed in from outside.

"Thank you," Negan said without moving or opening his eyes.

"You don't need to thank me."

"Yes I do. Shit, you took the lead out there. You didn't fuckin' panic and you got us out of that shithole mess we were in." He opened his eyes to meet her stare, "I suppose we're still in a shithole mess."

Amy sighed out another decompressing breath and could see the sea of walker heads through a window. "Little goals."

"Glad you're so optimistic. That fuckin' makes one of us." He turned when he heard commotion coming from behind a set of double doors and then turned back to Amy when she turned to him too. There was a collection of voices, all talking loudly but each one muffled out the others.

"Who's that?" She wondered out loud, though she knew Negan knew just as much as she did.

He reached for her hand without thinking and Amy took it. "We're about to fuckin' find out."

She took a deep breath and walked side by side up a small flight of stairs, crossing through the doors into a gray hallway with concrete walls.

The voices became more clear now, echoing from around the corner somewhere. Immediately, Amy recognized Simon's booming voice filled with angst as he responded to questions like a politician.

"Is he dead?" Someone asked, "Is Negan dead?" The crowd went into an anxious chatter and Simon called for them to calm down as he prepared to respond.

"Negan.. might be dead. He was cornered, Rick closed in on him. I'm in charge now."

"So Negan is dead?"

Amy saw amusement cling to Negan's features, though betrayal lingered in Simon's words from his lack of sympathy of their current situation.

Amy sighed as they prepared to enter the hallway where the mob of Saviors raged on in a panic as Simon tried to rally them around him.

Negan pulled Amy with him, releasing her hand as they made their way around the corner, making an entrance behind Simon as if he was the opening act to the main show.

"Negan." His name echoed off the tongues of the members of the crowd and Simon turned around slowly upon feeling his presence behind her. The shock on his face oozed with disappointment and his eyes barely met Amy's as she accompanied him.

"Simon." Negan's hand clamped down on his shoulder. "We are so fuckin' fortunate to have made it out alive. Fuck that was close!" He beamed a smile and then looked out at the crowd. "I'm not going anywhere. We will rebuild this shit. We will retaliate. We will bring all we got at those motherfuckers and attack Alexandria once the home field is back to being in tact. You fuckin' know why?" Negan grinned wider and pointed out, "Because we're the motherfuckin' Saviors."

Simon looked back at him with a stern expression as the group of men and women began to feel a life force from the sight of their leader alive and well.

Without looking away from Simon, Negan shouted out the words, "Who are you!?"

"Negan!" The crowd shouted back. "We are Negan!"


	27. Closed and Open

Amy and Negan entered his room and both of them stopped to take a breath and process what had just happened.

Negan didn't think Rick had it in him. He knew he was dealing with a leader far different than he had ever encountered before; but when the bullets started flying from the small army of men and women corralled to take him down he absorbed an 'oh shit' feeling like never before. On top of it, the Sanctuary was a mess and Simon's loyalty was now in question.

Amy was being pulled in multiple directions. She was thankful that she and Negan had made it out alive from the chaotic events that unraveled. Unlike Negan she had no idea what they were dealing with Rick and his people. Would the Sanctuary recover? Were they on their way to being taken down? She didn't know and the idea of it all made her uneasy, to say the least.

"Are you alright?" Negan finally asked, not wanting to touch anything in the room after being covered in walker guts.

Amy nodded. "You?"

He gave a shrug and sucked his teeth before strolling toward the bathroom door. Negan glanced down at his leather jacket and shook his head, noting that even the most simple items could be taken for granted. He slowly peeled it off, wondering if his signature item of clothing could be saved and draped it over the back of a wooden chair in the corner before running water to wash up.

"Amy.." He called to her and peeked out of the door to see her standing by the set of windows off to the side, shaking her head.

"I can't believe this." Amy let out a deep breath and looked at him, imaging the circumstances must have felt far more devastating for the man that build the community.

Negan was about to cross the room but she slowly made her way toward him. "Wash up," he nodded his head toward the tub and Amy cleared her throat, staring at her blood-covered attire.

"Why don't you go first. I know you probably have to rally the troops and try to get things cleaned up."

He shook his head, "Can't get much worse right now. The walkers are in the fucking courtyard." Negan ran a hand through his hair and leaned against the frame of the door with his eyes closed. "I need a minute up here before I take that shit on."

"Okay." Amy headed into the bathroom and sighed. Before she started to remove her clothing she reluctantly made a request. "Do you mind closing the door?"

Negan moved away from the frame and cleared his throat. "Yeah. Sure. I'll.. uh.. there's a T-shirt of yours.." He cleared his throat again. "I'll just leave clothes by the door."

Amy swallowed and nodded at the same time. "Thank you Negan." When he nodded and closed the door behind him she closed her eyes and felt the heavy feeling return to the pit of her stomach. Slowly, she peeled off her shirt and jeans and then skunk her way into the bath tub that was still filling up with water.

The warm water made her want to float away. Amy slowly sunk down below the water level and immediately embraced having her senses cut off for just a moment. She allowed herself to focus on nothing but the feel of the water as it cleansed her body and soul, temporarily eliminating all the negatives that were swirling around her.

She vaguely remembered a yoga class she had taken once to appease a friend and tried to ease her mind by finding a temporary happy place.

A beach, Amy thought. She allowed her imagination to take her to a warm, sunny day where walkers and enemies didn't exist. The sun rays radiated a summer heat onto her tan skin as she basked in the sun. The waves lapsed gently in the background, kissing the sand and inviting beach goers to enter the ocean. Next to her on an oversized beach blanket was Negan laying shirtless on his back.

Amy abruptly brought her head and shoulders back above the surface, coming back to reality with a deep breath as she drew water away from her eyes.

Just like that the beach was gone and she was left staring at the brown, bloody water all around her in the small bathroom tub. The darkness returned with her reality and Amy turned when she heard Negan's footsteps by the closed door. She could tell he placed her clothes down.

Amy rushed to finish cleaning up when she acknowledged in her mind that Negan was still covered in blood and guts. The silver lining to her bath was the small bout of rejuvenation she felt when she finally stepped out. A good bath or shower in the apocalypse felt like being handed bars of gold.

With the tub still lingering with walker-blood water, Amy drained and then began refilling it before wrapping herself with a towel and slowly opening the door that led to Negan's room.

He stood with his back to her by an oversized desk at the far wall to the right and only turned his head partway for a second.

"You can have the room to change," he told her, purposely avoiding looking in her direction as he made his way across the room.

Amy nodded. "Thanks for letting me go first." She collected the clothes and then walked toward the bed.

"Well, you fuckin' saved us so.." Negan headed toward the bathroom door, still attempting to give her the privacy she requested.

Amy felt her heart grow heavy and could have cried again if it weren't for putting her feelings up against the bigger crisis going on at the moment. Despite what had happened her feelings for him were strong and even deeper they were real. Still, she wrestled with what she felt comfortable with in her mind as she trailed him to the doorway of the bathroom.

"Negan.. I'm sorry." Amy gently placed a hand on his shoulder and then leaned her head gently against his back. "I'm sorry for what they did to your home."

Negan swallowed hard and closed his eyes. He wanted to spout his bullshit boastful lines to her like he did everyone else but he knew Amy saw right through that. And so he was honest with her.

"It fuckin' sucks." Negan bowed his head slightly with a sigh and reach a hand back to rest on hers. "I have to clean up doll."

Amy lingered against him for a moment and whispered, "Okay." She was reluctant to move away from him but allowed him to cross into that bathroom as she reached for the handle to close the door.

Negan still didn't look back as he peeled off his shirt while walking to the tub. "Leave it open."


	28. Benedict Arnold

The Sanctuary had been sectioned off into branches that were being overseen by Savior leaders. Negan had taken a group of his own, as well as Dwight, Simon, Arat and several others. Within days of round-the-clock efforts, their home began to slowly regain it's stability. Fences were mended, walkers were abolished by the masses and a clean-up crew at every station finished off whatever mess had lingered.

Amy had purposely avoided Simon, though her curiosity was peaked with a bout of anxiety at his potential Benedict Arnold behaviors in the wake of Negan's attack. She had questions - several of them; and Amy knew the proper approach was to ask Simon, himself.

Simon had resided in the main courtyard where the heart of the attack had occurred. Amy had seen him both barking orders and getting his hands dirty and sought out an opportunity to talk to him when he stood smoking a cigarette on top of the concrete platform just a step outside of the that led inside.

He saw her coming and after a brief bout of eye contact he shifted his attention to the workers, cupping his hands around his mouth to shout with the cigarette dangling by his lip surrounded by a puff of smoke.

"The fence is our priority!" Simon called out, "Patch that last part up and then move on to other shit!"

"Simon." Amy slipped in beside him and rested her forearms on the iron bar that served as a railing. She suddenly felt tongue-tied and waited for him to finally glance over at her. "Hey... I just... I want to say I'm sorry." The statement came out like a question, and she wanted to cringe from the words that rolled off her tongue. It wasn't what she intended to lead off with.

"Sorry for what?" He mirrored her position and folded his hands so they dangled loosely over the railing.

"I feel like we haven't talked much since the Alexandrians attacked."

"It was more than just the Alexandrians," Simon corrected, "That was a conjoined assault on this place. They're rebelling. Shit isn't working for us the way it used to."

"I never got the chance to ask if you were okay."

"Well, you ran right after Negan, though, didn't you."

Amy pressed her eyebrows together, "Someone had to." She wanted to throw in his face that he hadn't been brave enough to do it.

"Yeah... yeah and it had to be you, didn't it?" Simon turned to her now and took the cigarette between his first two fingers.

"Well considering it wasn't you-"

"I tried to pull you to safety, so don't start that shit. There was a hail of fucking gunfire out there."

"I'm not blaming you," Amy explained, "But don't point your finger at me because I tried to do the right thing and save him."

Simon huffed a laugh and then took a drag, blowing the smoke away from Amy. "Why do you like him?" He shrugged and held a baffled, unamused smile beneath a bushy mustache, "I just don't fucking get it."

"You're his friend, Simon." As she said it she remembered Negan's vow that he had no friends.

"That's fuckin' news to me." He shook his head, "He doesn't take any shit that I have to throw on the table seriously. Negan loves to call me his top guy; his right-hand man." Simon took another drag and let the smoke parade through his nostrils before puffing out a small breath. "Everyone here is just another one of his little bitches. I was hoping you wouldn't fall into line like that. But, shit, who am I to judge. I'm doing the same damn thing."

"So I'm a little bitch, too, is that it?" Amy shook her head, "Well, now I'm just going to say it flat out. I think you're jealous."

"Get the fuck-"

"You're jealous," she said again, "You don't like that I spend time with Negan instead of you. I saw the look on your face when you saw me having dinner in his room."

"So go be with him, then." Simon laughed in the same miffed manner, "Go join the team of wives, doll up and wait in his bed for him instead of doing some of the badass shit out here with us and show your worth."

"So if I do both then what, Simon? I'm not a badass with worth because I enjoy sex? What because I'm a woman? Is that it. It's alright for guys like you and Negan to fuck who you want, but when I do it I get this shitty judgmental analysis?"

"It has nothing to do with you being a woman." Simon gritted his teeth, "Fine.. fuck.. fine! I just thought for a fucking second that you wouldn't fall for his shit like I've watched everyone else do time and time again. But you did.. and you can call me wrong for feeling this way but I was disappointed.. and yeah a little fuckin' jealous because, open book here, I don't think Negan is half the man I am."

Amy maintained her hard stare for a moment and then raised her eyebrows, taken off guard by his admission.

"Not for fuckin' nothing.. you shouldn't be one of dozen wives. You're a ride or die kind of chick. And it bugs the shit out of me that you're falling for the guy who doesn't appreciate that shit." Simon felt his temper ease as his voice steadied again and stared at Amy, who still remained speechless.

A silence lingered amongst them for a moment before Simon put a hand on her shoulder. Before Amy could process what was going on, Simon gingerly slid his hand up her neck toward her cheek and then leaned in and kissed her.


	29. Options

Amy opened her eyes wide and pushed Simon back. Shock clung to her features as ahe looked him directly in the eye. "What are you doing?" She demanded.

"Be with me, Amy. You won't be just an option for me." He shook his head, "You and I could take over the damn world." Simon huffed a laugh but quickly let his smile fade. He shook his head. "Why?"

"Why.. what?"

"Why are you with him? With Negan." The name rolled off of his tongue in mild disgust. There was no attempt to hide it.

"I'm not," Amy insisted. "I'm not with him." She knew the next sentence wasn't what he would want to hear, "But I'm not with you either, Simon."

He put his hands on his hips and looked down. "I just thought for a minute.. just a minute.." Amy waited as he struggled to find the words to complete his sentence, "You're better than him. Don't stay hung up on his bullshit. Because that's what it is - just bullshit."

The two of them stared at one another for a moment with an intensity that left Amy ready to shudder. Simon's eyes were serious and black, burning into hers as he anticipated what she would say next.

Amy's emotions were tugging her in different directions. She felt bad for Simon but also a little pissed off that he kissed her. On the same note she could see that his intentions had no ill will toward her, though clearly his disdain for Negan had risen to the surface without reserve.

"I'm sorry Simon."

"Just think about your options. That's what I'm offering you here. An option."

Amy shook her head, not knowing what to say and abruptly turned to go, leaving him to stand there in defeat as she hurried around the building where the area was clear.

Drama - it was virtually nonexistent in Amy's life until now. She loved flying peacefully under the radar without the fear of baggage weighing down her choices or emotions. Now she found herself involuntarily thrown into a warped love triangle that she wanted no part of. Amy was real enough to know that it wasn't her fault for the fracture in Simon and Negan's friendship; though she acknowledged that it didn't make things any better.

I have to go, she thought to herself as she changed course and entered the building where Negan had given her a room.

Amy didn't know where she would go. There was no direction, but she was confident in her developed survival skills and will to live. Leaving the Sanctuary was something she felt she had to do even though her heart was pouding mercilessly out of her chest.

She found herself running down, skipping steps on the stairwell while simultaneously digging in the pockets of her jeans for the key to her room.

Amy's conscious mind reminded her of her self-proclaimed weakness in being impulsive at times. Still, it didn't stop her from packing up her essentials, writing a short note for Negan, loading up with as much water as possible and heading to the garage in search of the keys to the Jeep that she and Negan had stolen.

Her heart pounded as she hurried to her own sanctuary within the Sanctuary. Entering the garage gave her goosebumps, as her fondest memories lingered there. It made her heart sink as her throat grew tight when she thought of her first passionate kiss with Negan.

I love him. Amy knew that much and finally acknowledged the feeling with her her whole heart and mind. It didn't scare her like she thought, but it didn't change her mind either.

With a deep breath she reached for the Jeep keys on a key ring beside the oversized bay door. She took a moment to gaze at every corner of the garage that her eyes could see, taking mental photographs of the bittersweet space that would leave her with memories worth reminiscing on in the future. She then proceeded to load up the back seat with her belongings before whipping open the bay door and putting the car into drive.

The feel of the shifter in her hand as her foot caressed the clutch sent an emotional rush through her core. She imagined Negan sitting beside her, his deep scratchy voice humming witty jokes that made her swoon for reasons she didn't fully comprehend.

In that moment as the car idled Amy began replaying their relationship from the moment they met on the farm to their drives and silly conversation and the passion that later brewed into heartache for a man like she hadn't felt before.

"What am I doing? What am I doing?" She whispered the words aloud to herself as tears streaked her face. Leaving meant the real possibility of never seeing Negan again. Staying left her as a wedge between high ranking members of the community that was already cracked and broken.

Amy shook her head and proceeded to exit the garage. The Jeep's tires swiftly climbed over the uneven landscape as she hurled it around the corner and toward the exit.

Without allowing anyone to approach her, Amy left as quickly as she'd come. Where she intended on going? She had no idea.


	30. A Note

Negan made his rounds, noting which areas of the Sanctuary still needed repair. Overall he was pleased with the condition of the community and actively began switching his thoughts to plans of retaliation against Rick. if nothing else, he was a man who felt the need to get shit done.

The last section he covered was Simon's, and nodded to himself in quiet approval when taking note of the area.

"Good work." Negan smacking his lightly on the back, making Simon jump as he hadn't sensed anyone approaching.

"Shit." He swallowed hard and turned to Negan's amuses grin.

"Don't be so fuckin' jumpy." Negan huffed a laugh and looked around. "All hands on deck got this shit patched up pretty quick." He looked back to Simon, "Now we can start planning our next move."

Simon studied Negan, not knowing if he was aware of the move he had made on Amy. Visions of others having their faces ironed popped into his head for the first time, but he shook off the feeling with a shudder.

"Who shit in your cereal?" Negan asked, noting the expression on his face.

"Shit.." Simon smiled wide now and looked around. "We still have some fence to patch up." He nodded, "What are you thinking about counter attack?"

"We'll call a meeting later tonight." He smacked him on the back lightly again. "Keep your radio on."

Simon nodded. "Will do." He felt a rush of relief when Negan continued on his way with no sign of confronting him.

Negan kept his eyes open in search of Amy, though when he didn't find her at any of the stationed work zones he headed back to his room in search of her there.

When he arrived to find his room vacant he felt a slight anxiousness rattle around in his abdomen in the form of metaphorical butterflies.

Where is she? He wondered, eying her t-shirt that hung over the arm of the couch. Negan slowly crossed the room and touched the cotton sleeve of the shirt before exiting and hurrying to make another round. It was when he failed to find her again that he made his way to her room, again, only to find it empty.

Negan abruptly lifted the radio to his lips and was about to call for her when he saw a piece of white paper with his name written boldly across the top.

He hurried to where it sat on her pillow and sat down on the twin bed in the corner of the room as he read the letter she'd left.

Negan,  
I knew if I saw you I'd change my mind, so rather I just left. Please forgive me for taking the Jeep and hoarding some water. If I ever find another vehicle I'll try to repay you in some way. Things got too complicated here and it's not something I'm used to. By that I mean the wedge that seems to be driven in between you and Simon. You need to work together if you want the Sanctuary to be strong again and I have a negative effect on that. He cares for me, I care about you and it's affecting the dynamic of things. Patch things up with him if you can. One last thing you need to know is that you are the only man who has ever kept me interested enough in him to get my heart broken. I'm okay but I already miss your laugh, your smile and your infectious personality. I will cherish the time we had together in my memories and I can't believe I was able to find some form of love in a world so dead. But it's true, I love you Negan. I hope you find what you're looking for. I hope the "driving lessons" helped and that the Sanctuary will land on its feet. With you in charge I know it will.  
Amy

Negan shook his head as his eyes frantically landed on every word while his fingers dig into the sides of the piece of paper.

"Fuck." He stood up and barreled out of the room, hurrying down to the courtyard and immediately confronted Simon.

"Where did she go?" He barked, prompting Simon to turn. Negan held up the paper. "Amy.. where the fuck did she go?"

"What are you talking about?" Simon went to reach for the letter but Negan roughly pulled it back.

"What did you say to her?" He hissed, "She's fuckin' gone."

"Gone?" Simon wanted to read the note but didn't dare lunge for it again.

"Fuck this." Negan pushed past him and stormed away, heading for the garage and wishing that he would find Amy there. When he rushed in through the door to find the large bay open and the Jeep gone he cursed aloud and slammed Lucille down through a cardboard box, sending metal car parts flying into the air. "Fucking fuck!"

He slammed the bat again several more times before standing up straight, breathing heavy and running a hand through his hair. Negan eyed Lucille in his hands as he brought the bat up in front of his face and then eyed a motorcycle by the far wall.

Negan closed his eyes for a moment and thought of the state the Sanctuary was in. Things were on the ups. There was no expectation of another attack. His counter attack would happen when he decided it would.

"Fuck it." Negan grabbed the keys to the motorcycle, zipped up his leather jacket, tucked Lucille into his back and secured the note in his pocket. He knew he had to find Amy before someone more dangerous did.


	31. One Man Search Party

Negan whipped around the back roads on the motorcycle in search of any indication to where Amy might have gone. The area where they did their first set of driving lessons was clear of any signs of life. There wasn't a tire mark, a good wrapper, or any other sign that she might have been there.

He drove frantically around the streets that led away from the Sanctuary and worried that she might have gone completely off the grid so far away from their little corner of Virginia that he may never find her.

I could be going in the complete opposite direction, Negan acknowledged in his mind. Still, he tried to ignore that little voice that kept telling him it was virtually impossible.

When the better part of an hour had passed Negan slowed to a halt in a remote area beyond the typical traveling zone for the Saviors. For a moment he just sat there straddling the bike and contemplating what his next move should be.

Part of him wanted to believe that Amy might have changed her mind and made her way back to the Sanctuary; though he knew in his gut that that wasn't the case. On the same note he couldn't envision her completely abandoning the only area she was completely comfortable with. There was a stubborn side to Amy that Negan admired but she was also strategic and smart.

She wouldn't go far, he thought to himself as he stared outward down the road that led to nowhere. At that moment a lightbulb went off and revved the motorcycle up, flipping around in a wild U-turn that kicked up dust and sand into the air. There was one place that Negan hadn't checked that made more sense than anywhere he'd gone that day - the farm.

...x

As the night sky crept in to invade the small Virginia town, the roads grew a shade darker as rain began to decorate the pavement.

Negan squinted hard as the droplets assaulted his face, leaving his body damp as he cruised up past an old, wooden fence that bordered the property.

The silhouette of the farm house quickly came into view though unlike his first visit to the place there were no signs of life. Stray walkers littered the area though the herd that had previously invaded was long gone.

Negan ease on the throttle of the bike up the uneven landscape that was beginning to look more like a mud pit than a dirt driveway. He noticed several bodies of walkers that had been put down and felt a flicker of hope at the possibility that Amy had been there. Still, there was no sign of the Jeep and any evidence of tire tracks had been washed away with the rain.

The undead in the area eerily switched their focus in unison to where Negan stopped the bike beside the old barn. In the darkness through the steady rain he picked up on every stumbling shadow that growled its way in his direction.

"Come to Daddy motherfuckers." Negan removed Lucille from his back and actively pursued the closest walker, bashing its head in with one swiftly blow that left it spinning halfway around before slumping to a heap on the ground.

The next set came in a pair, forcing Negan to act fast as he connected with the first and kicked the second one back long enough to cock back and take a second swing.

There were a handful of others invading the space, though rather than use his energy to fight them all he ducked into the barn and let out a loud sigh when he secured the door behind him.

"Fuck." He huffed the word and ran a hand through his rain-slicked hair. When Negan began to take in the interior of the barn his eyes became fixed across the way.

Amy edged out from under a short loft and stared at Negan in disbelief. Tears crept slowly down her cheeks and she quickly swiped them away with one hand.

Negan felt frozen when he saw her and had to tell his brain that what he was seeing was real - he had found Amy.

"What are you doing?" She asked, her voice shaking as she shook her head.

Negan let his jaw drop for a moment before finally responding. "I spent the last couple of hours looking for you," he explained, wiping lingering raindrops away from his eyes.

"I didn't want you to come looking for me."

"I had to." He told her, "I don't want you on your own out here. It's not safe."

"You need to be with your people at the Sanctuary," Amy's voice shook, "Rick's people could-"

"The Sanctuary is fine." Negan let out a deep breath. "I want you to come back." When Amy brushed her hair away from her face and started shaking her head he went on. "Please. The shit between me and Simon is a lot more complicated than both of us feeling the way we do about you." Negan paused again. "Please come back with me Amy. I won't bother you. I'll fuckin' leave you be and I'll give you whatever you need. I don't expect anything from you but I need to know you're safe. I need that."

Amy swallowed hard. "How did you find me?"

"Luck," he admitted, still taking in deep breaths.

She couldn't take her eyes off of him. In that moment she didn't care of any indiscretions or lies or unorthodox leadership tactics Negan practiced. Amy saw the man without the mask he put on for everyone else - the man who made her laugh, who saved her, who listened to her point of view and acknowledged her toughness in a way that felt empowering. He was the man that had searched for her in the pouring rain until he found her despite the Sanctuary being in shambles and the fact that people wanted him dead.

He came for me, Amy thought to herself. Seeing him standing there looking at her with such uncertainty and submissive eyes sent her strolling across the barn toward him. She couldn't believe he had spent the time and resources to find her.

Negan swallowed hard when Amy fiercely hugged him, wrapping her arms around him so tight that it began to hurt.

He hugged her back, breathing into her ear as the sides of their faces touched before pulling back to receive an unexpected powerful kiss that Amy initiated.

Negan kissed her back, letting out a series of deep breaths through his nose.

Amy sighed aloud and pulled him close again so her lips realigned by his ear.

"You came for me," she whispered in disbelief.

"Please come back honey." Negan desperately pleaded. He hugged her harder and continued to repeat the word. "Please."

Amy's uneven breaths compliments the shaky nature of her hands and she pulled back to look him in the eye. All she wanted was to hold him and kiss him and thank him. Leaving had been a difficult, emotional decision; and being on her own at her old house had only left her feeling empty. Negan filled that hole in her chest immediately as he had walked through the door. Amy decided to stop ignoring that feeling.

She brought her lips back to his again, letting her eyes alternate between open and closed to see Negan's eyes shut as he melted against her like he would never get the opportunity again.

"Okay," Amy agreed. She didn't try to hide her emotions this time and allowed her tears to fall. "I'll go back with you."


	32. Run Away

Sorry for long break in between posts!

* * *

Negan and Amy stood by an open window in the loft of the barn overlooking the property. The rain continued to say its hellos, drumming heavily in an even pattern on the roof.

Walkers littered the area, some still drawn to their location after Negan's abrupt entrance, though others staggered away aimlessly across the docile farmland.

"I didn't expect you to follow me," Amy told him. She shook her head and leaned a hand on a wooden beam beside the opening.

"Why?" Negan looked her in the eye.

"I just.. a part of me wanted you to and a part of me didn't." She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. "But I'm glad you did."

He let out a breath and then sat down on the oversized ledge in a pile of hay. "I know that I lost most of your respect.. but honestly I've never wanted to fuckin' fight for someone's approval this bad in my whole damn life." Negan looked outward, "I should have told you everything - not just about those women but all of the shit I've done."

"You don't have to," Amy assured him.

"I fucking hate that I'm responsible for you feeling like you had to leave the Sanctuary. And I can't fucking stand that Simon was the one that told you about all that shit. I didn't entertain any of them since you and I started getting together and that's the fucking truth. It doesn't make what I had been doing right, but I made those decisions before I knew you. I wish I didn't but I did and honestly.. I want you; just you. I know that's not fair to-"

Amy leaned in and kissed him again. "Any man that would risk his life trying to find me deserves a second chance." She took a breath and left a hand on the side of his face. "We should get back. I can't stand being here."

"It's your home." He pressed his eyebrows together in confusion.

"No," Amy shook her head. "Not like this. Not with all the death and walkers and.. lack of life.. and people."

Negan ran a hand through his hair and nodded, looking outward again at the wall of rain. "We should wait until it dies down." He glanced over at her. "Where's the Jeep?"

She cleared her throat. "It ran out of gas."

"Well shit." Negan's lips twisted into a smirk and then he let out a little chuckle, making Amy snicker.

"I know.. not my finest survival skills moment." She sighed. "I was upset and wasn't really.. focused."

"We'll take the bike back," he told her, "Come back for the Jeep later with some gas."

"Bike?"

"Motorcycle."

Amy nodded and refocused on the rain. "That the only option?"

Negan nodded. "That's why we need to just fuckin' wait it out."

"Are we safe.. from Rick and-"

"No one knows we're here."

Amy nodded subtly and touched his forearm before creeping her hands down so they rested in his. She toyed with his fingers with her own and then looked back up to him. Before she could lean in for a kiss he interrupted.

"Did you mean what you wrote?" Negan asked.

Amy swallowed hard and felt her face grow hot. She had forgotten about the note she had left on her pillow for him. "What, uh.. what part?"

"You know what part," he challenged.

She glanced down at their interlocked fingers and squeezed his hands before relaxing her entire body with a hefty deep breath. Amy leaned against him so her head rested on his chest but failed to answer the question. Being open and vulnerable wasn't something she was used to and so she hid against him to avoid eye contact.

Negan didn't press the issue or repeat the question. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "I wish we could leave it all behind."

"What do you mean?" Amy asked softly, her gaze mindlessly dancing off the dark brown walls of the barn.

"If I could.. just being here in this barn surrounding by the fucking dead.. just you and I.." Negan let out a sigh against her hair, "It makes me want to run away with you. Just you.. leave it behind us - The Sanctuary, Rick, Simon.." He meant it; for the first time he truly felt as if he could walk away from the post-apocalyptic empire he had built.

"We can't." As bad as Amy wanted to and as wonderful as it sounded to hear Negan say that she knew they needed walls; the needed a group; they needed the structure that the Sanctuary provided; the world that Negan had built. "We need to go back to the Sanctuary." Amy pulled back and looked up at him. When Negan didn't say anything she ran a hand through his hair, "But I think we should make the most of our situation."

"What do you mean?"

Amy linked her arms around the back of his neck and kissed him, indulging in all of her feelings for him. She then swiftly removed the shirt she had been wearing and tossed it to the side, leaving Negan with his eyebrows raised for a moment before she pulled him back to her.

"I'd run away with you," Amy informed him. "I fantasize about it." She removed her bra now and kissed him hard again. "But we need the Sanctuary and the Sanctuary needs you."

"Us," he corrected her, closing his eyes with a sigh when she began to tug at his clothing.

"Let's enjoy tonight.. take a roll in the hay.."

Negan chuckled but immediately fell back into the heat of the moment when crashed her lips back on his.

"And then we'll ride that bike into the motherfucking sunset and show Rick what a big mistake he made by attacking the Sanctuary."


	33. The Rain

**Thanks as always for reading :)**

* * *

"Why are you so good to me?" Negan's gruff voice accompanied a laugh as he laid with Amy partially on his chest listening to the rain still patting down on the roof of the barn.

"I don't know," she answered with a laugh of her own, tracing her fingers down his chest.

"Fair enough."

"No, I.. I just think I met my match with you." Amy sighed. "I've never had this hard of a time walking away from a guy before."

"Is that why you ran away instead?"

She glanced up at him and shook her head when he smirked. "Not to be a bitch.. but you're lucky I-"

"I know," Negan cut her off. "I met my fuckin' match with you, too, honey. I've never chased a woman who's run out on me before."

"So this is a pattern for you with women?" She asked, half-kidding.

"Unfortunately." He huffed a breath, "And it's only the second time I've regretted it."

"So what then going forward? I'm not going to be one of many. I shouldn't have even slept with you." Amy made a face and smiled, "The setting and your heroics got the best of me." She cleared her throat, "And the mental image of you on a motorcycle."

Negan let out a hearty laugh. "I'll ride that shit every damn day if that's what it'll take to get you to ride me like you just did." He snickered again and looked down at her. "I told you I've been long done with all that shit. Things are going to change when we get back.. in a lot of ways." Negan cleared his throat, "You're still coming back right?"

"No I got what I wanted out of you," she joked.

Negan laughed. "Well I can offer that daily if you come back with me."

"Go easy on Simon. He was looking out-"

"His intentions aren't fuckin' pure as you might think."

"I know," Amy assured him, "But you need each other."

"Right now I need Simon like I need a hole in my fuckin' head."

"I just think you ought stand united with Rick and all these other people after you. I'm sure you're familiar with the divide and conquer tactic."

Negan sucked his teeth and looked at her but couldn't hold back a small smirk, "You know you are being a pain in the ass right now."

"Because I'm right?"

"Yes," he confirmed and then let out a deep sigh. The two of them laid there silently for a few minutes and Negan tightened his arms around Amy and kissed her forehead.

Amy closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. "Maybe the rain won't stop."

Negan looked down at her and waited for her to return his stare. He met Amy halfway for a kiss, leading into a second and third.

"Let's eat first," she whispered against his lips, smiling when he let a chuckle ripple through his chest.

Negan hugged her harder and laughed, "There's food here?"

"I have a hidden stash."

"Okay," he agreed, "Only if you prepare it naked."

"Oh I'm the one preparing it?" Amy teased.

"I'm the guest in your barn, honey." Negan cleared his throat and snickered again when she continued to eye him, "Why don't we prepare it together."

"As long as you're naked."

He laughed again and this time Amy joined in as they shared another kiss.

"And then you'll let me fuck your brains out?" Negan asked. When she raised her eyebrows he smiled wide, "I mean.. make passionate barn love to you.."

Amy smiled wide and grabbed the bottom of his face, planting a kiss on his lips. "Maybe I'll let you do both.. it for the first one, I'm in charge."

Negan looked down at his visible erection. "Well.. I don't think naked dinner is going to fuckin' be an option right now."

"You're not used to a woman taking charge are you?" Amy asked, touching him now and smiling as he unwillingly surrendered his power to her. She put her lips to his ear as his eyes closed, "It turns you on doesn't it?" She whispered.

Negan's Adam's apple rose and fell in his throat. Before he could respond Amy straddled him and kissed him hard. "You can make dinner while I smoke a cigarette after I ride your dick," she whispered against his lips now.

"Holy shit." Negan growled. His eyes were closed and he barely managed a half smirk of approval in the aroused state he was in.

"Then.. as long as you weren't bullshitting me before.. we'll call it even. And after dinner.." Amy kissed him again. "The sweet barn love."

Negan let his eyes flicker open in a lusty haze. The two of them shared a moment of playful eye contact before he smiled again. "That's a fuckin' deal."


	34. The Barn

The rising sun had all but squashed Amy's fantasy of remaining in the barn with Negan forever.

She hadn't slept much, though felt a sense of contentment as she laid beside Negan in her former home listening to his even breaths as he had slipped away into an unbroken slumber. Amy thought it was a bit out of character for him to be relaxed enough to sleep the way he did.

A smile crossed her face when she attributed his carefree nature to her strength as a fighter and his trust in her as a lover. Amy quietly acknowledged to herself for the first time that she trusted him - she trusted that he hadn't entertained his wives since they had been intimate and that they would be seeking new employment once the two of them got back to The Sanctuary.

Even though it was an incredibly pigheaded way to be living, she thought, but what rules are there to be living by?

She stopped herself before she subconsciously changed her mood. Amy knew they weren't supposed to have moments like the night they shared - not in the apocalypse. The post-walker takeover version of life was supposed to be a lot of gloom and doom and it hadn't disappointed. She recognized now that they truly were allowed to have bright spot amongst the storm.

"Shit." Negan's groggy voice made Amy turn to him, "Rain stopped."

"You're not under contract to go back," she reminded him and then teased, "We could just stay here and be that weird couple who managed to stay alive on their remote farm. People will tell stories of us ya know."

He chuckled and happily indulged in her story, "Roger and Ethel?"

Amy laughed and rested a head on his bare shoulder. "Exactly."

"We'd have to find some horses.. cows.. chickens and all kinds of farm shit." He gently pulled her head to his lips and left a kiss on her temple.

"Don't forget a tractor."

"Right.. right.." Negan's chest barreled with another low, fleeting laugh, "You just want to see me ride it. I think it'd turn you on like the motorcycle."

Amy couldn't keep a smile from her face as the two of them carried on with their farm story - the little fantasy they could relish in for a short time more before getting back to the violent, risky business of surviving.

He glanced down at her, making eye contact as they both continued to grin before he playfully pinned her beneath him.

"Since the hour glass is fuckin' ticking, doll.."

"Hour glasses don't tick," Amy whispered, still giggling as he pushed her knee to the side with his own and settled himself between her legs. She closed her eyes and accepted a long, closed-mouth kiss on the lips.

"That is true," Negan laughed when he parted from her. He looked down at her and said something he hadn't for as long as he could remember. "I'm sorry."

Amy, also our of character, reached a hand up and touched the side of his face. "You must be something special.. because I'm letting you off easy."

Negan grinned and accepted a kiss on his lips. "Want to get me off easy?"

"I already have," she giggled against his lips and urged him all the way back down to her. "But yes."

For a minute neither of them upped the intimacy past an intense make out session, though when Amy trailed her fingers down his midsection, reaching for him he eagerly pushed himself inside of her and got their lovemaking session underway.

With a sigh against her neck as he lowered himself down he whispered near her ear. "Do I have to make you a meal for this one too?"

Amy laughed and moaned at the same time as he purposely began to thrust his hips, still pinning his chest against her as she held him tight.

The two of them enjoyed their final moments alone in peace at the farm, allowing themselves to escape reality for just a short time longer.

...

Negan hopped on the motorcycle and grabbed Amy's arm before she could jump on behind him. He then pulled her to him and planted a kiss on her lips.

"I want you," he spoke quietly as if people were around to hear him. "Fuckin' all of you.. just you."

"I know," she whispered back.

"Tell me if you want me too, baby."

Amy smiled and kissed him before hopping on the bike behind him and put her lips to his ear as he revved the engine.

"I want you.. only you."

"Fuck yeah.." Negan grinned. "Hold on tighter baby. We got some shit to take care of.. together."

Amy felt free on the ride, feeling her hair blow in the breeze as she held on tight to Negan. Like their night together in the barn, she wished the ride would never end.

I think I love this man, she thought to herself. Amy knew it was crazy - it sounded crazy in her mind but she was beginning to feel things she hadn't before and was finally brave enough to acknowledge it.

She wrapped her arms are him tighter and smiled as he placed a hand over hers across his midsection. For the rest of the ride Amy closed her eyes, rested her head on his back and enjoyed the rare moment of freedom on the way back to the Sanctuary.


End file.
